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Marvel’s “Eternals” Reviews Are In; if you like Thor : The Dark World then you’ll love this!

sol_bad

Member
Fair enough. The idea that they made her deaf/mute, but "not really" because she has extrasensory abilities that render the condition functionally irrelevant and basically just gives her a quirky "accent" for character dressing is a valid one and is how Marvel has been using disabled characters so far.

From a story writing perspective it is a TERRIBLE and LAZY move though. Beings created by near omnipotent godlike beings for a specific and vital purpose, gifted with all manner of superpowers, have no in-universe reason for this disability. It should INFURIATE you that they just casually throw deafness in there as if it were a trait like red hair and then immediately trivialize it by having the character undergo no struggle, overcome no obstacles, and be able to sign effortlessly to the point where she can make comments WITH NO ONE LOOKING AT HER and the other folks just read the subtitles and carry on. There was no point in the making of this film (at least what I've seen so far) where they really considered how a deaf/mute would really interact with the other Eternals and the humans around her, no underlying reason for her condition (like all of the Eternals were slowly degrading and had to deal with and overcome new limitations), and no narrative payoff for it like in an appropriately constructed story. It is the very definition of pandering.

We can pick apart the entire concept of sending monsters to clear out apex predators as well, since in virtually ALL CASES the apex predators are actually the smartest animals of their ecosystem. What role did the deviants play on earth? Did they ever mention it? If the intent was that the deviants clear out things like dinosaurs (or at least the large carnivorous ones) to allow for the rise of a "smart" being, what evolutionary pressure then drives that smart being to evolve and become smarter? Harsh and ever-changing environments are the KEY to developing intelligence. Obviously for a kids film I wouldn't necessarily expect these concepts to translate directly, but come on, that plot was so paper thin a weak sneeze blows right through it. We should demand more from our MCU by now, they have clearly established the concept and honed the formula to the point where we should insist on good scripts as well as decent CGI, snappy dialogue, and lots of battles.

I think the movie you're looking for is Sound of Metal.
 

Trogdor1123

Member
Watched it with the wife last night. It was very meh. It wasn’t bad but it sure wasn’t good. The whole way through I kept thinking “why isn’t this a mini series?” It would have been better served. I didn’t think the quality too high either

The characters just weren’t interesting except Ajax (what a waste) and Icarus, we can’t include the black knight either as he wasn’t even in it. The rest were boring or even something I rooted against . The ending makes no sense either.

They strayed way to far from the source material on this one. I can’t remember the comic being that inclusive either but honestly that wasn’t an issue for me.

The deviant transformation was just glossed over to for some reason

Pretty disappointing as it had crazy potential.
 

RoadHazard

Gold Member
I never watched this one in the theater, but I really enjoyed it on Disney+. Not my favorite, but very worth a watch. It really makes the whole MCU go BIG in a cosmic way that has never really been the case before.

Same with Shang-Chi, that was a fun movie (although not nearly as "epic" of course).

Overall I think Marvel are on a roll. No Way Home was great (and that one I did watch in the theater). The only recent one I thought was very meh was Black Widow.
 
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AmuroChan

Member
It's not nearly as bad as Thor 2. It's like a 6/10 movie for me. It had some good moments, but ultimately I think it's going to be viewed as a bottom 10 MCU movie.
 
It's a superhero movie...but sure....let's draw the line on how sign language was non-existent on ancient times.

I like how everytime bad writing and nonsense shit comes up in a movie the automatic defense is "it's a super hero movie guys, ppl can fly and shit". Im too tired for this shit but sure, dude, it's a super hero movie, they should always have dumb shit in them like an enternal that looks like an indian becoming a bollywood actor lmfao.
 

sol_bad

Member
Damn bro didnt know american sign language was available in ancient times. Maybe its not ignorance, it's the writting being dumb as shit.

The ancient races aren't doing the sign language. Not sure if you paid attention or had your phone in hand 90% of the time but the Eternals are an advanced race, they aren't part of the ancient races of Earth. By the 1700's you could say that the Eternals inspired the human race to use sign language.
 
The ancient races aren't doing the sign language. Not sure if you paid attention or had your phone in hand 90% of the time but the Eternals are an advanced race, they aren't part of the ancient races of Earth. By the 1700's you could say that the Eternals inspired the human race to use sign language.

No, that aint it chief but nice try.
 

Valonquar

Member
Not sure how mind control or running really really fast trumps flight + super strength + super eye lasers when it comes to helping humanity grow. Inventor dude I can see, but most of the rest serve so little purpose.
 

Pilgrimzero

Member
Finally watched it. Went in expecting to find it at most boring.

I was wrong.

I really liked it. Yeah they could have shaved off 30 minutes but it was fine.

It probably helped that the characters are based on Greek Heroes/Gods etc Thats right up my alley. Heck even my fave Athena is represented.

Thor 2 remains the worst Marvel IMO for being just plain boring. Shang Chi's down there to. As in Iron Man 3 and Ant-Man and Wasp.

If I had to set it next to another film, probably Dr. Strange or Black Window. Somewhere in the lower half of all the films.
 

Doom85

Member
The ancient races aren't doing the sign language. Not sure if you paid attention or had your phone in hand 90% of the time but the Eternals are an advanced race, they aren't part of the ancient races of Earth. By the 1700's you could say that the Eternals inspired the human race to use sign language.

Exactly. Besides, Marvel’s Earth is not meant to be our Earth exactly even beyond the superhero elements so historical deviations aren’t really an issue. I mean, I’m pretty sure Wakanda and Latveria don’t exist on our Earth either.
 
Language in film is a convention that can be adjusted on the fly based on the perspective currently portrayed.
In this movie there's no difference between the usage of English and that of American ASL. Why bother to invent a new sign language? For all we know the spoken language of the Eternals is actually throat singing.
Babylonian is used to establish the otherness of humans and how and why some Eternals integrate. Integration through language is used for characterization - the main woman masters it to get closer to people, Superman tries to learn it to get closer to her, the kid is hungry for the acceptance of mature humans, the deaf one is feigning ignorance to run her cons...
 
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DeafTourette

Perpetually Offended
Language in film is a convention that can be adjusted on the fly based on the perspective currently portrayed.
In this movie there's no difference between the usage of English and that of American ASL. Why bother to invent a new sign language? For all we know the spoken language of the Eternals is actually throat singing.
Babylonian is used to establish the otherness of humans and how and why some Eternals integrate. Integration through language is used for characterization - the main woman masters it to get closer to people, Superman tries to learn it to get closer to her, the kid is hungry for the acceptance of mature humans, the deaf one is feigning ignorance to run her cons...

Thank you!
 
I thought the Bollywood guy was gay at first but it was the inventor guy instead.

For a brief moment, I agreed with inventor man when he was on his knees after Hiroshima crying that humans aren't worth being saved.

He also has the coolest power imo - "Hyper Invention" or at least that's what that power was called in the old TSR Marvel TTRPG.

Most people hate me here for my takes on the MCU since most of you are fans, so it's weird I actually think this movie wasn't as bad as other MCU films and to a degree, I enjoyed it more than many others including Shang-Chi.

Mind you, I wouldn't pay money to see a sequel but I'd up to seeing it on Disney Plus.

But please, ffs, hire or contract or whatever a better SFX company. There is just no excuse for the atrocious CGI and effects especially after seeing how good a TV show with much less budget like Boba Fett can accomplish.
 
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Was it really American sign language? If so, that is pretty stupid.

Yes and it would've taken them 5 minutes to just have a simple sign language for the sake of adding a cool small detail like every good movie in existence but to be fair, as others said, it's just a superhero movie but that is one issue among the other 100 dumb things that make no sense related to the entire plot. There comes a point in a superhero movie where your tolerance for nonsense can break and The Eternals not only breaks that, but goes above and beyond to be as dumb as possible. "we dO nOt InTerFere oK?" then lets the dude mind control thousands of ppl into a fucking cult lmao. Oh they need humans to keep evolving on their own but also lets help them by giving them every single tool in evolution, also the more humans the better to awaken the celestial but then they just let Thanos kill half of humanity basically ruining and delaying the plan but they also have a dumb ass justification for that as well. You know a movie is bad when fans have to defend every single stupid plot device the movie came up. And dont even get me started on the characters and how fucking useless they were especially Ajak. They just got rid of great characters too fast without allowing us to relate more to them. Makkari was basically Flash and was cool but was extremely wasted as a character because she could've basically just fucked everyone up and rofl at the villains, evolved only to get killed by useless Angelina Jolie in a few seconds. Nah the more I think about this movie the worse it is. I've said my piece about it and this is my last reply here. I need to delete this from my memory as a Marvel fan.
 
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DeafTourette

Perpetually Offended
Was it really American sign language? If so, that is pretty stupid.

You mean like every alien species and demonic otherworldly beings natively speaking English despite never meeting earthlings? And when they DO meet earthlings, everyone can understand everyone else?

ASL for an actual deaf character (and actress) is the least thing to be hung up on
 

Doom85

Member
Yes and it would've taken them 5 minutes to just have a simple sign language for the sake of adding a cool small detail like every good movie in existence but to be fair, as others said, it's just a superhero movie but that is one issue among the other 100 dumb things that make no sense related to the entire plot. There comes a point in a superhero movie where your tolerance for nonsense can break and The Eternals not only breaks that, but goes above and beyond to be as dumb as possible. "we dO nOt InTerFere oK?" then lets the dude mind control thousands of ppl into a fucking cult lmao. Oh they need humans to keep evolving on their own but also lets help them by giving them every single tool in evolution, also the more humans the better to awaken the celestial but then they just let Thanos kill half of humanity basically ruining and delaying the plan but they also have a dumb ass justification for that as well. You know a movie is bad when fans have to defend every single stupid plot device the movie came up. And dont even get me started on the characters and how fucking useless they were especially Ajak. They just got rid of great characters too fast without allowing us to relate more to them. Makkari was basically Flash and was cool but was extremely wasted as a character because she could've basically just fucked everyone up and rofl at the villains, evolved only to get killed by useless Angelina Jolie in a few seconds. Nah the more I think about this movie the worse it is. I've said my piece about it and this is my last reply here. I need to delete this from my memory as a Marvel fan.

Jimmy Fallon Reaction GIF by The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon


Bruh, you’re accusing us of being blind fans defending the movie in certain ways, and yet you’ve entered blind rant mode with that MASSIVE paragraph. Calm down. You see something as a plot hole, others don’t, it happens. Nor do plot holes “prove” a movie is bad.

I think the “hold your fire. There are no life forms aboard. It must have short circuited.” line from Star Wars Ep. 4 is insanely stupid given the existence of droids and how the Imperials knew they were looking for the Death Star plans, and Vader himself even says “she must have hidden the plans in the pod” so why was this one officer so incredibly stupid? But I don’t try to claim it “just shows” the movie is bad. Hell, they’re conveniently speaking English despite it being a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away, but people decided to enjoy the movie and not get hung up on details like this.

If you can’t get past these elements, fine, but don’t act surprised when others don’t mind. A lot of the films you love have nonsensical elements that other viewers might not be willing to put up with as well. I‘m not even claiming Eternals is great. I think it’s fairly good due to the directing, cinematography, action scenes, and a few specific characters, but hurt by sometimes having pacing issues and other characters being under utilized. Okay? So no, we’re not all blind fans defending every single thing the MCU has done.
 
Stuff like everyone speaking English is handwaved away by universal translators. They even showed that the humans were speaking a different language than they were (at the time.) Using American sign language can't be handwaved away.
 

Alx

Member
Stuff like everyone speaking English is handwaved away by universal translators. They even showed that the humans were speaking a different language than they were (at the time.) Using American sign language can't be handwaved away.
You litterally can.

giphy.gif


hope it's the right gesture, I had to google it. :p
 
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DeafTourette

Perpetually Offended
You litterally can.

giphy.gif


hope it's the right gesture, I had to google it. :p
That's "hands off" or "I'm not touching that", right?

Stuff like everyone speaking English is handwaved away by universal translators. They even showed that the humans were speaking a different language than they were (at the time.) Using American sign language can't be handwaved away.

But it's the same thing... The Eternals were speaking English (to us)... Which is what Makkari (the speedster) was doing... She was speaking ASL (to us) ... But she was speaking her own sign language ...

Yes and it would've taken them 5 minutes to just have a simple sign language for the sake of adding a cool small detail like every good movie in existence but to be fair, as others said, it's just a superhero movie but that is one issue among the other 100 dumb things that make no sense related to the entire plot. There comes a point in a superhero movie where your tolerance for nonsense can break and The Eternals not only breaks that, but goes above and beyond to be as dumb as possible. "we dO nOt InTerFere oK?" then lets the dude mind control thousands of ppl into a fucking cult lmao. Oh they need humans to keep evolving on their own but also lets help them by giving them every single tool in evolution, also the more humans the better to awaken the celestial but then they just let Thanos kill half of humanity basically ruining and delaying the plan but they also have a dumb ass justification for that as well. You know a movie is bad when fans have to defend every single stupid plot device the movie came up. And dont even get me started on the characters and how fucking useless they were especially Ajak. They just got rid of great characters too fast without allowing us to relate more to them. Makkari was basically Flash and was cool but was extremely wasted as a character because she could've basically just fucked everyone up and rofl at the villains, evolved only to get killed by useless Angelina Jolie in a few seconds. Nah the more I think about this movie the worse it is. I've said my piece about it and this is my last reply here. I need to delete this from my memory as a Marvel fan.

Umm .. no. It wouldn't just take 5 mins to make up simple sign language. Do you even know what ASL or BSL or any other sign language is? It's pictures with hands... The sign for ocean, fire, candle, sky, Grace, etc... They're all pictures with hands. Not random made up hand gestures.

It makes sense how the Tusken raiders had their own sign language that isn't ASL (although it was BASED on ASL and created by an actual deaf actor) because they're supposed to be a bit more alien to most beings ... ASL isn't that alien.
 

DeafTourette

Perpetually Offended
I know ASL but there are regional signs and some signs change over time. I BELIEVE that's what I think it is... It looks similar to the sign I use.
I was going for "whatever/don't care/so what", but if anyone here knows ASL feel free to correct me. :)
 
I can really shit on Marvel Cinematic Universe movies like Hans during a German poop video.

A lot of people hated Eternals, even MCU shills.

The weird part was.... I didn't think it was that bad at all. It was a bit slow and the characters weren't all that fun and that one kid has a face you want to just punch over and over again until it resembles nothing but a Dragon Quest slime, but overall I kind of like the movie.

Maybe, just maybe, it has something to do with the fact that I like ancient alien shit but I think it's a little bit more than that. Definitely not a great movie but actually better than a lot of MCU movies I've seen.

Oh shizzle my fizzle I posted in this thread before.
 
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sol_bad

Member
I can really shit on Marvel Cinematic Universe movies like Hans during a German poop video.

A lot of people hated Eternals, even MCU shills.

The weird part was.... I didn't think it was that bad at all. It was a bit slow and the characters weren't all that fun and that one kid has a face you want to just punch over and over again until it resembles nothing but a Dragon Quest slime, but overall I kind of like the movie.

Maybe, just maybe, it has something to do with the fact that I like ancient alien shit but I think it's a little bit more than that. Definitely not a great movie but actually better than a lot of MCU movies I've seen.

Oh shizzle my fizzle I posted in this thread before.

It wasn't hated by a lot of people, a lot of critics yes, but filmgoers no.
It's sitting at 78% on Rottentomatoes, 6.3 on IMDB, 4 stars on Vudu, 3.1 on Letterboxd and 73% of people like it on Google. That's fairly positive all around.

*EDIT*
Actually, majority of critics didn't hate Eternals, it was split pretty evenly sitting at 47%. Yeah, you can say that's the majority but only by 3%.
 
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NahaNago

Member
I have somewhat mixed opinions on it. I enjoyed watching it but I didn't think it was that good. It needed to either be longer like 3 hours or more or made split into several movies since it covers characters who live for thousands of years.
 

HoodWinked

Member
Thinking about this now, my view on it is mostly unchanged.

The problem is that it doesn't really feel like it even belongs in the MCU. And worse it feels like it conflicts with the already established MCU and cheapens the events of Infinity War.

Also the ensemble cast sucks it feels like they are all fighting for screen time and casting much bigger stars for the supporting role just makes the film feel unfocused like you're watching the side story.
 
At its worst day this is mid-tier MCU. Not nearly as bad as some people made it to be.

Also, the 3rd act was quite great. It just takes a while to get there.
 

bitbydeath

Member
Thinking about this now, my view on it is mostly unchanged.

The problem is that it doesn't really feel like it even belongs in the MCU. And worse it feels like it conflicts with the already established MCU and cheapens the events of Infinity War.

Also the ensemble cast sucks it feels like they are all fighting for screen time and casting much bigger stars for the supporting role just makes the film feel unfocused like you're watching the side story.
Exactly this.
 

sol_bad

Member
Thinking about this now, my view on it is mostly unchanged.

The problem is that it doesn't really feel like it even belongs in the MCU. And worse it feels like it conflicts with the already established MCU and cheapens the events of Infinity War.

Also the ensemble cast sucks it feels like they are all fighting for screen time and casting much bigger stars for the supporting role just makes the film feel unfocused like you're watching the side story.

Why does it cheapen Infinity War?
 

Wildebeest

Member
I compared this film to the new Dune before, but having seen both now I think I prefer this just because I have already been overexposed to Dune. It is a shame that it is only really right at the end, where cool things happen and anyone has a reason to care about anything. The reaction to so many of the twists and turns was like, "so what, you give me no reason to care." They really sucked at making these eternals or deviants look like strong characters who individually could be compared to Thanos. Could easily have been fixed by something like one of the flashback scenes being them beating the shit out of Thor or something.
 

sol_bad

Member
I compared this film to the new Dune before, but having seen both now I think I prefer this just because I have already been overexposed to Dune. It is a shame that it is only really right at the end, where cool things happen and anyone has a reason to care about anything. The reaction to so many of the twists and turns was like, "so what, you give me no reason to care." They really sucked at making these eternals or deviants look like strong characters who individually could be compared to Thanos. Could easily have been fixed by something like one of the flashback scenes being them beating the shit out of Thor or something.

Actually, since you brought up Dune, even though it has a smaller cast it still feels like there is absolutely nothing interesting about any of the characters in that film. Barely any characterisation if you ask me, and I didn't care about any of the characters that died.
It was just a visual and audio treat, still one of my favourite films of last year.
 

Wildebeest

Member
Actually, since you brought up Dune, even though it has a smaller cast it still feels like there is absolutely nothing interesting about any of the characters in that film. Barely any characterisation if you ask me, and I didn't care about any of the characters that died.
It was just a visual and audio treat, still one of my favourite films of last year.
Maybe this is a modern Christopher Nolan thing. Make it look good and get Hanz Zimmer to make a really brash soundtrack that assaults the viewer's ear drums, then nobody cares what the characters are saying or what the story is.
 

Ulysses 31

Member
Why threaten one universe when you can rule every universe?
dszvznkwcz841.jpg
Was Dr. Doom always that strong in the comics? Or is that in a point in time he had "levelled up"?

I recall him vs Spider-Man in the comics and Fantastic 4 cartoon and he wasn't that strong in those.
 
Actually, since you brought up Dune, even though it has a smaller cast it still feels like there is absolutely nothing interesting about any of the characters in that film. Barely any characterisation if you ask me, and I didn't care about any of the characters that died.

Rofl what?

Dune gives ample time for characterization and gives room for the actors to breathe. The protagonists all have their own scenes that explore their motivations and relations to each other. Only because the movie isn't outright telling you how to feel about the characters like in most Marvel movies, doesn't mean that there is no characterization.

Lay off the formulaic superhero dreck.
 
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