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[zeioIIDX]

My bidet a couple years ago has been such an incredible upgrade that I go out of my way to NOT use a toilet in public because I can no longer tolerate taking a shit and wiping with dry-ass paper. The squeaky clean feeling you get from using a bidet is unmatched. I use less toilet paper now as well because when I wipe, it's simply to dry off. I would loooove to upgrade some day to one of those advanced Japanese toilets that warm your water, self-clean, and all sorts of other things. For real, if you're on the fence, just try a bidet out for a week and see how much of an upgrade it is.

 

[GeekyDad]

There are too many dirty retards in this place who are proud of being dirty retards.

Hey man, be as insulting as you like. But if you think water doesn't simply spread the bacteria more, then well, who's being retarded? If you're simply using water to "clean" that area without soap, you're spreading the bacteria more easily than if you had just wiped with paper.

 

[MrMephistoX]

I own a Japanese Toto Bidet: it plays a midi tuned Steamboat Willie when I flush.

 

[ResilientBanana]

Any one want to join me on my European world tour?

Hint...

 

[Elektro Demon]

That's not a bidet. That's a toilet that sprays water in your bumhole/vag.
Bidet is something else and it's not designed to clean your poo hole. It's designed for women on their period so that they can wash their vag.

 

[Texas Pride]

If you're not using soap with your water you're not cleaning your ass you're just spraying your shit all over the place. There's nothing appealing about spraying your shit everywhere like a savage and then putting your wet dirty ass in dry clothes.

 

[Piku_Ringo]

no. *laughs in skidmarks*

lol cause yer fat as fuck.

 

[Croatoan]

No, I am sorry I wont. I told you not to buy those stocks.

 

[Breakage]

A bidet doesn't sanitise.
Hot shower w/ soap is the gold standard.

 

[The New Guy]

Does TP just not do the job for some people?

It does, but I never feel 'fully clean' even after wiping. As Chris Pratt nicely puts it:

 

[blockhead77]

$35 on Amazon.
Thirty five dollars that will change your life. Hate to break it to you, but wiping will not clean your anus. The bidet provides the moisture and even a little pressure needed to clean the area. It also saves money on toilet paper since you'll use less than you otherwise would. And of course save you tons from having to buy "flushable" wet wipes.

Common misconceptions:

- The water is too cold especially in the winter. Not really. Its room temperature like your toilet. Same water source.
- The pressure is too high. Nope. You can easily adjust it so only a light stream comes out. Doesn't hurt a single bit.
- Hard to install. You can install a bidet in 30 minutes or less. You just connect a T to your toilet's water hose, and screw the bidet in between your toilet seat & the toilet itself.

We won't move to the metric system. We won't move to celsius. But dammit I'm telling you guys the foreigners have it right when it comes to bidets. Make the transition.

Dang I want a bidet now

 

[notseqi]

it plays a midi tuned Steamboat Willie when I flush.

Was that the OG Cleveland Steamer?

But if you think water doesn't simply spread the bacteria more,

More... where? Down the toilet or drain, where it belongs. Traditional ceramic bidets offer soap and some form of towel so you can wash the pain away.
Butt sure, butter up your rusty sheriffs' badge with fecal matter, Bacteria Lives Matter.

 

[jufonuk]

first time I used a bidet I was like woaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh,, yeah then my asshole was cleaner than a freshly cleaned table at McDonalds man shit was tight.

 

[Stiflers Mom]

This is a bidet my dude

you mean that was not the bowl I was supposed to dump into in that french hotel?

 

[Foamy]

I just ran the garden hose up through the bathroom window. Now I have the choice of six spray setting on the gun and lots of pressure. Gets a bit messy though. Water everywhere and shit blasted onto the walls from floor to ceiling.
But hey, the ol butt is clean as a whistle.

 

[Virt McPolygon]

Americans have struggled to adopt the practice of wearing masks to prevent spreading of a virus... decades after other countries have found it effective and responsible.

No way they'll agree to effective and responsible asshole cleaning!

 

[AJUMP23]

My itchy bottom says I don’t need one.

 

[real1]

Honestly I impulse purchased a Luxe bidet one day off amazon. The one with both hot and cold and a pussy cleaner (behind the balls for guys lol) and it is seriously a life changer. I can never go back. I am honestly scared of traveling somewhere and NOT having a bidet.