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Indiana Jones 5 "An Atrocity"

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https://www.express.co.uk/entertain...screenings-Harrison-Ford-Phoebe-Waller-Bridge
(Article might have some spoilers)
ehhh I was looking forward to this movie.
"Disney is so upset over this situation. When Disney announced the one-year delay in the release date, I was told Disney was mandating reshoots for this atrocity in an effort to avert disaster. But now given some brand new information provided to me by my Hollywood spies, I honestly don’t know what the hell they were doing this last year because from what I’m hearing, Indiana Jones 5 is a genuine s***show, a bomb just waiting to explode in theatres that will forever tarnish the brand and ruin Indiana Jones.”
 
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Aggelos

Member
mc8P6X1.jpg
 
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Read the article and ohhh shit. That’s the direction Disney wants to go?! Good luck with that. Kind of reminds of the Gang getting to preview “Thunder Gun 4 Maximum Cool” and hating it. 😄
 
In a better timeline:

>Lucas: look, these films (the prequels) exist, if you don't like them, fine. but making some shitty documentary about me and the way how i handled the films is some autistic manchild shit that would you're parents and ancestors embarrassed about you're purpose on this planet - what do you have to say for yourselves?

>Prequel Haters: you're right.......even though i have my justications for hating the films, being a manchild isn't gonna fix our existence as autistic peasants

>Lucas: Good, now have a healthy lifestyle, buy transportation, find a good job and earn tons of money, find a woman and have sex with her, produce a offspring, and make your own product of entertainment piece of media
 
I'm going to make a bold guess. Based on James Mangold's history, I bet this was going to be something vastly different for the property, such as a history period piece or a introspective character film about Indy and his past, but the people giving feedback probably just think whatever is there is too boring and they want him to emulate movies 1 through 3.

Edit: Out of all of Harrison Ford's fan favorite movies that keep being revisited with new entries, I'm at least glad that Blade Runner 2049 ended up as such a well made sequel.
 
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clarky

Gold Member
Not really. Its pretty sad to see Indy go down the pan like this. Raiders and Crusade are a couple of stone cold classics, and Indy himself an iconic character. Shame. They fucked Star Wars, now Indy is about to get fucked some more after the last tragedy of a "movie" .
 
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BouncyFrag

Member
The plot sounds worse
Indy and his new companion go on a zany and wacky time travel adventure using stonehenge which is actually a celtic time travel portal, to stop some former nazis who are using another form of time travel to re-write history so the nazis win WW2
Hopefully it isn't true
tumblr_oefvb6xxXU1tsfx8ro1_400.gif
 

Rest

All these years later I still chuckle at what a fucking moron that guy is.
Everyone already knows.
 
I think regardless if this review is accurate or not, this new Indy movie is probably going to be a disaster especially in the current climate.

Edit: someone gifted me gold? I just noticed that.
 
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MrMephistoX

Member
https://www.express.co.uk/entertain...screenings-Harrison-Ford-Phoebe-Waller-Bridge
(Article might have some spoilers)
ehhh I was looking forward to this movie.
"Disney is so upset over this situation. When Disney announced the one-year delay in the release date, I was told Disney was mandating reshoots for this atrocity in an effort to avert disaster. But now given some brand new information provided to me by my Hollywood spies, I honestly don’t know what the hell they were doing this last year because from what I’m hearing, Indiana Jones 5 is a genuine s***show, a bomb just waiting to explode in theatres that will forever tarnish the brand and ruin Indiana Jones.”

If this is a bomb, it'll be the first I'll have seen from James Mangold as a director. I'm still hopeful it's at least better than Indy 4 with him at the helm.

It’s true all of it. This is why I’m actually okay with the Star Wars sequels killing off Han and Luke and (unintentionally) Leia. People want sequels from the 90’s when the actors were young and able to convincingly pull off action scenes not the adventures of Old Indy. Hell I’d actually prefer a reboot of Young Indy Chronicles on Disney Plus with Andor Level production values and a script over another Indiana Jones film with aging Harrison Ford mentoring a young girl replacement since Shia didn’t work out…fuck that’s honestly all they have to get Harrison a goddamn pipe and a rocking chair and make it a flashback series just like Young Indy that’s fucking it. They might as well deep fake Harrison and set him up against deepfakes Hitler and deepfake Goebels at this point. That would still be more entertaining than 70 year old Harrison Ford pretending to be able to fist fight across CGI stunts over a blue screen or the medium.


Hallelujah! Holy Shit! Where’s the Tylenol!?

*Editors note reading this as if acted by an exacerbated Chevy Chase is the only way to express how fucking pissed off Crystal Skull Fuck and Indy 5 make me: Spielberg has made stinkers before and everything Indy past 1989 and Jurassic Park after 1997 are it!
 
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Bragr

Banned
I like to think Ford wouldn't sign on if it was some slap in the face to the character.

And James Mangold is a talented guy.

So I'm going to remain hopeful.
Ford is so old, he just does stuff for fun.

This is Disney. They have absurd production practices. Its almost unbelievable how much they screwed up. Impossible to trust them.
 

Bragr

Banned
It’s true all of it. This is why I’m actually okay with the Star Wars sequels killing off Han and Luke and (unintentionally) Leia. People want sequels from the 90’s when the actors were young and able to convincingly pull off action scenes not the adventures of Old Indy. Hell I’d actually prefer a reboot of Young Indy Chronicles on Disney Plus with Andor Level production values and a script over another Indiana Jones film with aging Harrison Ford mentoring a young girl replacement since Shia didn’t work out…fuck that’s honestly all they have to get Harrison a goddamn pipe and a rocking chair and make it a flashback series just like Young Indy that’s fucking it. They might as well deep fake Harrison and set him up against deepfakes Hitler and deepfake Goebels at this point. That would still be more entertaining than 70 year old Harrison Ford pretending to be able to fist fight across CGI stunts over a blue screen or the medium.


Hallelujah! Holy Shit! Where’s the Tylenol!?

*Editors note reading this as if acted by an exacerbated Chevy Chase is the only way to express how fucking pissed off Crystal Skull Fuck and Indy 5 make me: Spielberg has made stinkers before and everything Indy past 1989 and Jurassic Park after 1997 are it!
Hes actually older, hes 80 years old.
 
The plot sounds worse
Indy and his new companion go on a zany and wacky time travel adventure using stonehenge which is actually a celtic time travel portal, to stop some former nazis who are using another form of time travel to re-write history so the nazis win WW2
Hopefully it isn't true

Outlander without tits
 

JimmyRustler

Gold Member
The "scooper" is full of crap.

I'm sorry but the creator of Logan? James Mangold has had a METRIC TONNE more great movies than he's had bombs.

CLICKBAIT!
Tim Burton made Dumbo for Disney though.

No matter who it is, creators seem to be working with Disney in order to make cash and not to be creative. Disney execs always make the movie at the end of the day.
 
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01011001

Banned
I predict people will find a new appreciation for that movie, just like they did with the Star Wars prequel trilogy after Disney's movies.

That's what lowering the bar does.

it's all an elaborate plan to sell their older movies because they know we are all stupid enough to watch the new ones no matter if they suck or not...

Burnie Burns Conspiracy GIF by Rooster Teeth
 

Azurro

Banned
The source is a Neo Nazi on YouTube:




Don't be fucking ridiculous.

Your argument shouldn't be

if (person.speech IN stuff.Idontlike) {
return "NAZI!!!!";
}

I watch his videos sometimes. Not a single neo nazi thing has ever been said in any of his video, ever. You just like to shill for Hollywood and get triggered that people call out ridiculous woke nonsense.
 
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Loved the originals. 4 sucks so bad that I'm not sure I even want 5 to be good. Like so many other once-great franchises it's just kind of dead to me. There is no redemption. The only relative positive this movie can bring is an angry internet.
 
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