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[LucidMomentum]

So what are the odds of getting a fling for the holidays if I just put "Yo I just want someone to cuddle and watch Marvel movies with when it's cold outside." ?

TBH, I've got pretty low standards for Tinder, even OKC. Not in terms of who to date, but in terms of responses and what to expect.

I've been asked to be an OKC mod due to how many fake accounts I flag, etc. If it had gotten me any good dates I might have agreed.

I'm 5'10" and way less in shape than I used to be a few years ago so I just check it every so often then I go back to my hobbies / improving myself in the event that I do get a match.

 

[AyaisMUsikWhore]

Yeah I am.

I'm not sure if you're saying that really overweight women that are unemployed with lot's of kids can have a preference for 6ft men with good bodies and money, which by all means they can. What other people want is up to them.

But realistically how often do you see couples like that?

Online is all about what people want want want, how about what they can offer someone.

I think some people need a reality check as all that online attention doesn't necessarily reflect reality.

Yeah but this isn't exclusive to women so in the way you stated, you made it seem like her requirements are unrealistic when there are men who think the exact same way. Women may have more options but that doesn't mean it's a cake walk to finding someone you want either.

And wait, how did you know she was overweight, had 4 kids and no job?

 

[OCD Guy]

I was just dumbfounded that someone in that situation would have those kinds of standards. When I was online dating years ago the worst I saw was women like 5 foot zero saying they only date men that are 6 feet or taller, and even they at least were attractive. Never came across what you described.

Ah ok I wasn't sure, I did intially think it was that you were shocked that type of woman wanted that, but then thought wait this is NeoGaf so he might be shocked that I don't agree with women like that, wanting men like that.

Afterall someone has posted on the thread that there's no reason women can't ask for that regardless of their own situation.

Yeah but this isn't exclusive to women so in the way you stated, you made it seem like her requirements are unrealistic when there are men who think the exact same way. Women may have more options but that doesn't mean it's a cake walk to finding someone you want either.

And wait, how did you know she was overweight, had 4 kids and no job?

That example was on pof. My initial post was aimed at online dating in general, even though the thread was based around tinder, the same principles apply.

On POF with that particular example it mentions she's currently unemployed, and her profile outlines her children which come first, and the only type of man that should message her.

Anyway ultimately my main "issue" with online dating nowadays is that many women (not all obviously) have almost unrealistic checklists that men should meet before messaging them.

It's more than just being 6ft tall, and yes like you say there's no reason for women to not put what criteria they want a man to meet, as a way of filtering who contact's them.

But I feel in some cases it might be unrealistic. I also think the notion that men are more demanding and put more pressure on women to look a certain way isn't necessarily true, or as common nowadays.

My personal view (which many might disagree with) is these "demands" stem from some people receiving lot's of attention online which can start to unrealistically skew their perception on reality.

I think it would be fair to assume that an average woman would receive far more attention than an average man online, and at some point it could cause the woman to think she's nicer than she actually is, in the same way that the average man receiving no attention might start making him think he is worse than he actually is.

 

[GatorBait]

So why are you on Tinder if you "often" get attention from girls in the real world?

I do pretty well in the real world, but Tinder is always a nice option because I can easily set up a date while taking a dump. Never been able to do that in the real world yet.

 

[FairyD]

I need to get back on the online dating market. I feel like being a 5'3 indian and having me message the most beautiful girls would grind a bunch of people's gears.

 

[harSon]

This seems like way more effort than just naturally bullshitting the same topics over and over. Even if it were for a pure numbers game this seems like poor way to go about it. I mean I guess that's why you're spending your time going on dozens of dates in a few months....

It depends what you think the point of Tinder is. To me, it's a means to an end. That end game being meeting up with the person in real life. Tinder in itself is boring and meaningless, so whatever way I can speed up that process - and towards meeting someone face to face - I'm more than willing to do.

 

[Llyranor]

Ah ok I wasn't sure, I did intially think it was that you were shocked that type of woman wanted that, but then thought wait this is NeoGaf so he might be shocked that I don't agree with women like that, wanting men like that.

Afterall someone has posted on the thread that there's no reason women can't ask for that regardless of their own situation.



That example was on pof. My initial post was aimed at online dating in general, even though the thread was based around tinder, the same principles apply.

On POF with that particular example it mentions she's currently unemployed, and her profile outlines her children which come first, and the only type of man that should message her.

Anyway ultimately my main "issue" with online dating nowadays is that many women (not all obviously) have almost unrealistic checklists that men should meet before messaging them.

It's more than just being 6ft tall, and yes like you say there's no reason for women to not put what criteria they want a man to meet, as a way of filtering who contact's them.

But I feel in some cases it might be unrealistic. I also think the notion that men are more demanding and put more pressure on women to look a certain way isn't necessarily true, or as common nowadays.

My personal view (which many might disagree with) is these "demands" stem from some people receiving lot's of attention online which can start to unrealistically skew their perception on reality.

I think it would be fair to assume that an average woman would receive far more attention than an average man online, and at some point it could cause the woman to think she's nicer than she actually is, in the same way that the average man receiving no attention might start making him think he is worse than he actually is.

1) Complains that some women beneath his standards have standards,
2) Complains that he is considered beneath the standards of women online, and that it's not fair

 

[OCD Guy]

1) Complains that some women beneath his standards have standards,
2) Complains that he is considered beneath the standards of women online, and that it's not fair

Not quite.

Complains that online dating is making people lose touch with reality.

A woman wanting a man with a nice body, is the same as a man wanting a woman with a nice body. The internet has nothing to do with that. The same way the internet has nothing to do with some women wanting men taller than them, and men wanting women shorter than them.

The issue once again is that the amount of attention some people get online has caused what they now look for or expect from someone to be unrealistic, that generally explains why they can go onto become serial daters, and never find anyone good enough.

 

[Llyranor]

Who decides what is reality? If the average woman gets plenty of attention and her market value increases, is that not reality?

 

[Your Entertainer]

1) Complains that some women beneath his standards have standards,
2) Complains that he is considered beneath the standards of women online, and that it's not fair

Is this really what you gleaned from this post?

 

[Llyranor]

Is this really what you gleaned from this post?

Not just that post. The original bump was basically complaining about height being the main reason why he was unsuccessful.

 

[MogCakes]

They want to give guys a challenge. They'll give you nothing to work with and will say in their minds "Okay, be interesting. Go!" And if you're able to achieve that, then you may get a date or two.

As if anyone of substance who doesn't think with their dick would entertain that level of narcissism.

...

 

[AyaisMUsikWhore]

On POF with that particular example it mentions she's currently unemployed, and her profile outlines her children which come first, and the only type of man that should message her.

The only credit I give to this is at least she is honest. Something that a lot of men aren't on these dating sites.

Anyway ultimately my main "issue" with online dating nowadays is that many women (not all obviously) have almost unrealistic checklists that men should meet before messaging them.

Again, this is not exclusive to women but I can understand this. Men far too often get a pass on having nothing but sometimes good dick to offer and it becomes so annoying when even asking for some decency is some mile high issue. Superficial things like height and weight is down to science and social pressures so it's not like this is something that hard to understand... But more often than none, women are willing to accept one thing and not the other. The problem here is that if a women asks for something more, she should accept which is not fair because women do have cut off periods that men pretty much never have to experience (which sometimes doesn't even have to matter if we are going by looks) and settling is all we ever have to do.

Even when we are our most successful, 1:1 with men, we are still told to settle for something under our standards.

It's more than just being 6ft tall, and yes like you say there's no reason for women to not put what criteria they want a man to meet, as a way of filtering who contact's them.

But I feel in some cases it might be unrealistic. I also think the notion that men are more demanding and put more pressure on women to look a certain way isn't necessarily true, or as common nowadays.

I mean the fact that you pointed out that she had the gall to want a man in her criteria that you didn't think she should even have the audacity to ask for is exactly the demanding pressure that basically warrants this behavior. Women are 100% pressured by men to look and act a certain way and it in some ways angers me that even in our media (which highlights this issue very much with men also making decisions for women) that you would think those pressures don't exist. See: Feminism.

My personal view (which many might disagree with) is these "demands" stem from some people receiving lot's of attention online which can start to unrealistically skew their perception on reality.

I think it would be fair to assume that an average woman would receive far more attention than an average man online, and at some point it could cause the woman to think she's nicer than she actually is, in the same way that the average man receiving no attention might start making him think he is worse than he actually is.

The "nice guy" shick exist and there are men who think that "doing the right thing" entitles them to something... So all of this feeds that mentality as well.

Your concerns are real, but heavily throwing it to something that women do unequivocally moreso than men when we literally have stats and live examples that prove otherwise just makes this a false opinion. I do feel bad for guys who have to go through the online dating scene because women do hold all the power, but I can't be upset that it's one dynamic that women can actually control for once. Does it make the fight hard, yes and really I would hate to be in the position of men when it comes to this.

 

[Servbot24]

tinder is awesome.

Two weeks in i have 197 matches and 20 some conversations and have been on 4 dates mostly because i really liked the second girl and have been pushing off the others.

what the! i'm lucky to get one match a week

 

[OCD Guy]

Who decides what is reality? If the average woman gets plenty of attention and her market value increases, is that not reality?

It depends on who the attention is from in my opinion. Does a woman receiving lot's of attention from guys she perceives as ugly, old and fat mean she is suddenly able to catch the eye of models with good jobs.

Perhaps it does, attention is attention regardless of who it's from.

Not just that post. The original bump was basically complaining about height being the main reason why he was unsuccessful.

Height was the main example I used, but I specifically mentioned that I was "overwhelmed by the amount of women with shopping lists of what they want out of a man."

Anyway we're just going round in circles, you have your own opinion and I have mine. Neither of us is going to change what the other one thinks.

From my brief time online the majority of profiles of women of all shapes, sizes, and attractiveness were after the same type of man, that almost top tier specimen.

I'm not saying people shouldn't have high standards, and settle for anyone, but my honest impression when viewing some profiles was "really?"

The only reason I think like that is because I tend to think people generally play in their own leagues, obviously again there are exceptions, and beauty is in the eye of the beholder and all of that, but generally how often are you going to find a man who doesn't look after himself, has bad hygiene, bad facial features etc able to get a woman with almost model like looks, very well groomed etc? Generally that woman would be able to get a man similar to her.

If you found a dating profile of a man that was unemployed, very overweight, didn't take pride in his appearance etc and stated that he ONLY wanted women who had a good body, ate right, took pride in their appearance etc you wouldn't think it was a bit odd and unlikely? Or would you simply say well why can't he have standards that high?

 

[Liu Kang Baking A Pie]

Doesn't help when, like me, your interests are primarily intellectual and you don't care for having pictures taken, thus delimiting your picture choices bidirectionally.

Honestly you just have to do it. At the very least go somewhere visually interesting and take selfies there if you don't want to be in group shots. There are like a couple dozen photos of me, ever, but I made sure they weren't just in my room.

I'd also just be real and say something about being an introvert and that you don't find broadcasting yourself a natural thing (I'm guessing, because I'm the same way, but whatever you'd call yourself, own it), and maybe make a funny series of photos of you reading books (showing the covers of your favorites) in strange places. There are so many opportunities.

 

[kavanf1]

Not quite.

Complains that online dating is making people lose touch with reality.

A woman wanting a man with a nice body, is the same as a man wanting a woman with a nice body. The internet has nothing to do with that. The same way the internet has nothing to do with some women wanting men taller than them, and men wanting women shorter than them.

The issue once again is that the amount of attention some people get online has caused what they now look for or expect from someone to be unrealistic, that generally explains why they can go onto become serial daters, and never find anyone good enough.

I agree with your observations, at least based on discussions I have with some of the younger unattached guys at work. One guy (good looking, very fit, good job, basically a catch) was on a date with a girl from Tinder and while on the date she was on her phone...browsing Tinder. She wasn't doing it to be rude or because she didn't like him. He said she wasn't even conscious of it being a big deal, it was as inconsequential as checking her texts. When it gets to that point, that you can't even dedicate a few hours to one person without checking to see what other options are out there, it's gone too far, IMO.

 

[AyaisMUsikWhore]

Women skip right over it and move on to the next unless that guy reached out to her expecting her to accept all of that.

Men seem to be the one who come online and discuss these trials and tribulations about being rejected and viewing these profiles to complain. Women aren't doing this... And really don't care as long as you don't Holla.

Case and point... This thread. Ask yourself, where are the women on this board... And you'll find you answer.....like right here.

 

[OCD Guy]

Even when we are our most successful, 1:1 with men, we are still told to settle for something under our standards.

I mean the fact that you pointed out that she had the gall to want a man in her criteria that you didn't think she should even have the audacity to ask for is exactly the demanding pressure that basically warrants this behavior. Women are 100% pressured by men to look and act a certain way and it in some ways angers me that even in our media (which highlights this issue very much with men also making decisions for women) that you would think those pressures don't exist. See: Feminism.
.

You make some very good points, and I'm well aware of the pressures women have to go through. They are constantly told what is and isn't attractive. They have almost unrealistic examples of what is deemed attractive.

But I think that men nowadays are starting to go through similar. There's definitely more pressure on men to take care of themselves than there might have been years ago. But it doesn't seem to be taken as seriously as what women have to go through, Perhaps it's because women have had to deal with it far longer than men, and with men it's relatively new.

I find what's also happening is women are realizing that they have the "power" and therefore can afford to be more demanding.

Ultimately my "issues" with internet dating aren't simply aimed at women. I know men that for whatever reason think they can and should be able to attract a certain kind of woman just because.

My views are the same towards them, you can't surely expect lot's of good looking successful women to come to you if you take no pride in yourself, have bad personal grooming, lack ambition etc.

I agree with your observations, at least based on discussions I have with some of the younger unattached guys at work. One guy (good looking, very fit, good job, basically a catch) was on a date with a girl from Tinder and while on the date she was on her phone...browsing Tinder. She wasn't doing it to be rude or because she didn't like him. He said she wasn't even conscious of it being a big deal, it was as inconsequential as checking her texts. When it gets to that point, that you can't even dedicate a few hours to one person without checking to see what other options are out there, it's gone too far, IMO.

That's another aspect that is creating these unrealistic standards. There's far too much choice. There's always a niggling thought that someone "better" could be just a swipe away, and often they are, on the surface at least, until they go on a date, find one minor flaw, and it's back to the internet once more lol.

I said it before but some people assume the grass is always greener, but the forget that sometimes the grass is greener where you water it. You can't always have everything handed to you on a plate.

Going back to the shopping lists, women (and men) can filter people by so much criteria, height, body type, hair colour, ethnicity, it's exactly like online shopping. No wonder it can go to some people's heads.

Before internet dating was really a think people had preferences, but it got to a point where they met someone they got on with, found attractive and just went from there. But now it's getting to the point where people don't want to settle for anything less than their perfect specimen.

 

[Llyranor]

I'm not saying people shouldn't have high standards, and settle for anyone, but my honest impression when viewing some profiles was "really?"

The only reason I think like that is because I tend to think people generally play in their own leagues, obviously again there are exceptions, and beauty is in the eye of the beholder and all of that, but generally how often are you going to find a man who doesn't look after himself, has bad hygiene, bad facial features etc able to get a woman with almost model like looks, very well groomed etc? Generally that woman would be able to get a man similar to her.

If you found a dating profile of a man that was unemployed, very overweight, didn't take pride in his appearance etc and stated that he ONLY wanted women who had a good body, ate right, took pride in their appearance etc you wouldn't think it was a bit odd and unlikely? Or would you simply say well why can't he have standards that high?

What about if "really?" is the reaction of women when a sub-6' guy contacts then? When does it become unfair? Yeah, but the girl can lose weight and give her kids away for adoption, whereas you can't do anything for height! Why should fairness play a role in attraction, anyway?

You bring up leagues. You think being overweight and having kids brings a girl's league down. Why are women not allowed to use height as an important criteria in their 'league' system?

If someone doesn't meet my standards, I move on. I do not think about whether or not their own standards are too high or whatever. Even if someone met my standards, her displaying her own in stuck-up way would make me potentially dismiss her too. Attitude and personality are also very important criteria that many people ignore.

 

[Xun]

I go through patches of no matches, but now? I'm actively chatting with 6 or so girls, with a few potentially leading to dates.

It's bizarre.

 

[LucidMomentum]

Honestly, y'all acting like this is some new stuff that came up just because of Tinder.

Tinder has synthesized it down to it's most efficient and bare essence yes, but it's always been that way.

Two people have expectations, wants and needs.

They will try to find the person that best fits their needs and wants, and meets as many of their expectations as possible.

Guys do it, girls do it, and somehow feel like it's a personal issue when the two sets of wants, needs, and expectations don't match up.

Can't let it get to you.

Keep looking or see about changing yourself up a bit if you really want to, but doing that just to get dates (like the borrowed puppies for photos, etc.) probably won't help your self esteem in the long run. It's gotta be because you want to do it, not because you hope someone will like you better if you do.

 

[disappeared]

Honestly you just have to do it. At the very least go somewhere visually interesting and take selfies there if you don't want to be in group shots. There are like a couple dozen photos of me, ever, but I made sure they weren't just in my room.

I'd also just be real and say something about being an introvert and that you don't find broadcasting yourself a natural thing (I'm guessing, because I'm the same way, but whatever you'd call yourself, own it), and maybe make a funny series of photos of you reading books (showing the covers of your favorites) in strange places. There are so many opportunities.

This is solid advice.

 

[OCD Guy]

What about if "really?" is the reaction of women when a sub-6' guy contacts then? When does it become unfair? Yeah, but the girl can lose weight and give her kids away for adoption, whereas you can't do anything for height! Why should fairness play a role in attraction, anyway?

You bring up leagues. You think being overweight and having kids brings a girl's league down. Why are women not allowed to use height as an important criteria in their 'league' system?

If someone doesn't meet my standards, I move on. I do not think about whether or not their own standards are too high or whatever. Even if someone met my standards, her displaying her own in stuck-up way would make me potentially dismiss her too. Attitude and personality are also very important criteria that many people ignore.

I get what you're saying, and I'd like to reiterate that I'm not necessarily against height being used as a criteria.

I realise that it isn't the internet that has created this desire, it's always been there for some people.

The fine line between ridiculousness for me though is not that a woman want's a taller man, but the emphasis on the numbers. A woman might be totally attracted to a tall 5ft11 guy in person, but online because he's not that magic 6ft plus he'd be ignored regardless.

It makes as much sense as a man using weight as a way of filtering women and having a threshold, when two woman could weigh the same weight (and height) but have very different body types.

But again the argument will be that if a woman wants a man at least 6ft then why can't she? And the answer is she can do what she likes.

My own takeaway from internet dating is it's very tough for men unless you're over 6ft, and have a very good body. If you don't meet that criteria it's not impossible, of course it's not, I've seen some women state that they don't like muscles or some short women state that they don't want anyone too much taller than them. The internet has lot's of people all into different things, some only like black guys, some state only white guys, some state muslim only, there's a million different wants, so anyone can find someone, but some people might have to put more effort into it.

But from my brief experience a very common theme was height, body and tatoos on pof. But I know pof isn't the benchmark of life, and neither is Tinder. I'm not crying myself to sleep, or fearing being single forever lol. Just decided that internet dating isn't for me.

 

[ViewtifulJC]

Tinder is 90% visual. If you don't fit the criteria of tall/good-loooking/good shape/well-groomed/social interactive then you just need to get the fuck off Tinder tbh. Go somewhere where you can play up your other strengths. Where you can write longer exchanges, join social groups IRL where you have similar interests, do anything except complain about the inherent shallowness of a shallow by nature one night stand app.

 

[qcf x2]

I know it's been covered by a few here but... I'm pretty sure they are thinking you aren't the most engaging person either. You know how many dudes are asking her what she does, how she is doing, and other lame ass questions like that?

If girls match you this is the kind of shit you throw at them unless you are a 10 physically you aren't gonna get many dates. Be engaging yourself before you accuse others of not being engaging.

You know many of those "lame ass questions" are the cornerstone of face to face interaction, right? There's almost like a PUA culture surrounding messaging women on dating apps/sites... don't ask "lame ass questions," tell her a corny joke or comment on one of her pics that she uploaded 8 months ago so she won't understand wth you're talking about. Yeah, that's the ticket. Since it worked for some guys that's the way to go, right?

Put yourself on the other side of that conversation: are these interesting questions? They get these same questions dozens of times a day. Start witty banter or ask questions related to their stated interests. STAND OUT.

You know how many guys on Tinder are probably starting off with "witty banter" and questions related to their stated interests and still getting nothing in response? I'll give you a hint: It's not witty or original when tons of guys are doing it (and believe me, you're not the only one to comment on her theater background or start with a lame joke that was passed around on reddit).

The rule is simple and the rule is law: If the girl is physically attracted to you on Tinder -- a superficial site that doesn't pretend to be anything else -- she'll reply and ask questions herself. If you're at the bottom of her priority list, you're gonna get boring/lame/ignored.

Disclaimer: I am not an expert on how women think, nor do I pretend to be. I do however have yrs of experience behind the scenes w/ this particular industry (analytics included). I've seen what works and what doesn't, and statistically what works best is being the societal ideal (white, in moderate or better shape, without glaring physical flaws). If you've got that going for you then you're set, just take non-boring looking pics and smile and you're in there. Anything else and your odds are significantly lower, to the point that it barely matters what approach you take. It's just statistics: men outnumber women on dating sites by 40:1 and much higher, depending on the site. It's not hard to figure out where the inflated sense of attractiveness (and therefore pickiness/requirements) comes from; essentially a 5/10 irl equates to somewhere around a 7.5/10 online. Somebody mentioned that fat women have it worse than short guys and that's just false. It's probably nothing to do with how the genders think in general, it's just supply and demand.

Online dating works for some people, and as was mentioned recently in this thread (and as we constantly see evidence of) those people dominate the market. A large chunk of everybody else is kind of on the outside looking in and better off going the traditional route... with "lame ass questions" asked in person. That's not to say the rest of the world can't / won't find some success using apps, because whether you're black/asian/short/fat, there's gonna be somebody at some point who thinks you're worth a swipe right. Some of those are going to be niche based (ie suburban white chick who wants a tatted black dude with dreads and will settle for just a black dude for now) and some will just find you attractive. Those are more likely to be the outliers but hey, those are the ones you want to meet anyway.

Edit: As pertains to the thread title, just treat it as a routine and you'll be a-okay. No app in the world should ever affect your self esteem or feeling of worth. If it does, delete it and any other app that makes you feel that way ASAP.

 

[devilhawk]

I think an improvement in Tinder would be to time out select guys from being swiped by women after the guy reaches a certain level of matches. Would be far more useful than the current swipe limit. Women might like it as it reduces those who are collecting matches and ghosting. This might not be the fairest of solutions, but it would help out many gaffers haha.

You just know it is similar to the saying about sex - 5% of the people on Tinder are getting 95% of the matches, or whatever. I question that as a great long term business model

 

[OCD Guy]

The rule is simple and the rule is law: If the girl is physically attracted to you on Tinder -- a superficial site that doesn't pretend to be anything else -- she'll reply and ask questions herself. If you're at the bottom of her priority list, you're gonna get boring/lame/ignored.

Exactly.

I don't know why some people get so indepth about what to say, and what to have on a dating profile.

The reality is if a woman is not attracted to you online then what you write in a message or have written on your profile is unlikely to get a positive response (or response at all for that matter)

 

[EatinOlives]

Obviously many people (both men and women) have unrealistic expectations and have a long-ass laundry list of "requirements" for an SO. That's been the case since long before online dating ever existed. The issue with online dating is that you can quite literally filter out people by said "requirements", essentially encouraging that kind of behavior.

Women are picky on online dating sites because they can afford to be. There's way, way, way more women than men, and the proportion of men initiating conversations vs. women is extremely skewed toward men. If the tables had turned you bet your ass you'd be seeing men left and right with "laundry lists" and "if you have boobs smaller than D-cup MOVE ALONG!" That's more of the fault of the way the online dating dynamic has ended up being rather than an issue with women specifically.

In other words, the way that online dating is structured encourages shit behavior. Men are encouraged to "shotgun" messages with nothing but "sup" or outright harass people. Women are encouraged to be shallow as hell. The whole thing is screwed up.

 

[Kater]

That happened to me years before Tinder and I bet for all these dudes that say that it's the same. 😜

I also doubt that height is so important to girls to just dismiss someone just because of that. but it might be a factor in making the decision to dismiss someone. I dismissed someone before because his info was boring and he looked a bit lanky for example, but his looks were not the biggest turn-off, it was mostly the boring text. Yes, being the same height is nice so a tall woman might want to look for a tall man but that doesn't mean that you are automatically out of the race if you are below 6'1" lol. There's so many people on there and some of them might be willing to talk to you even if your nose isn't straight or your hair's a bit messy. That's my experience, anyway.

 

[Cindi Mayweather]

hahahahaha this thread is back

 

[4 is a cutie]

As long as women have to wear makeup, I'm cool with men having some hurdles as well

 

[LookAtMeGo]

I was about to give up on Tinder but then I hit the jackpot. She hates videogames and Im working on converting her but other than that its pretty fucking awesome.

Cute dog pic. Check.
Nature pic. Check.
Short but sweet description. Check.
Being active pic. Check.
Complimenting her cat in her pic with a cat to start conversation. Check.

 

[Furyous]

It's way too much shaming going on in this post. Y'all really letting Tinder hurt your self-esteem? Go out, hit the gym, get some muscles, or get a high paying job, roll up to the club bumping this, and proceed to get some numbers.

Really social media dating apps work?

Spoiler

I made a killing on some real estate broker during the recession shit with that one app used Facebook as a hookup app.

I left those days behind and now just frolic on the low philandering discreetly.

 

[Krauser Kat]

what the! i'm lucky to get one match a week

i also live in chicago proper and its dripping with swipes. Dont sweat you got this, dude i believe in you.

I was about to give up on Tinder but then I hit the jackpot. She hates videogames and Im working on converting her but other than that its pretty fucking awesome.

Cute dog pic. Check.
Nature pic. Check.
Short but sweet description. Check.
Being active pic. Check.
Complimenting her cat in her pic with a cat to start conversation. Check.

this pretty much my go to, or asking about their hobbies. i usually only compliment looks when i go for asking to see them in person and their number to set up a date in the next week.

 

[rambis]

Here I am shocked that people still use Tinder. I logged into to see, well I'll just say the pool seems to have dried up and there's only a certain type of female popping up.

 

[Subpar Spatula]

Some of y'all need to take rejection better. Whenever I read these stories, all I can imagine is someone who invested too much emotion into someone he just swiped right to and feels they deserve a response.

Geez.

 

[Roufianos]

I moved to a new city and tried Tinder again. For some reason I'm getting wayyyyy less matches in the new city. I thought it would be the opposite because this new city is much bigger but I guess it also means more competition... I think I'm just gonna borrow my friend's cute dog for a picture.

In Cyprus I swiped on like 50 girls and got 15 matches in a week. When I got back to London I got like 3 matches the next week after swiping on plenty more.

I think smaller population means less competition and more chance of being seen.

 

[Servbot24]

i also live in chicago proper and its dripping with swipes. Dont sweat you got this, dude i believe in you.

appreciate that man <3

I live in Austin TX which I would think would have plenty of options, but ah well. I probably need new pics or something.

 

[GraveHorizon]

Here I am shocked that people still use Tinder. I logged into to see, well I'll just say the pool seems to have dried up and there's only a certain type of female popping up.

Sarcastic dog filter-using hikers who love to laugh with tall guys.

I do actually see plenty of unique women, but my problem is that I'm pretty fucking boring. I'm like an 8 in looks and am in good shape, but I basically go to work, go home and do nothing, or watch anime with my one friend. I've met 1 girl from Tinder, and had a blast playing a board game with her, but maintaining communication and trying to set up another meeting is difficult. I don't have anything to say or any plans, and clearly can't compete with any friends or suitors she has in her life. Should I just give up? I'd have sex with everyone I match with, but I can't tell who's interested nor do I know how to get that going.

 

[Pickman]

Sarcastic dog filter-using hikers who love to laugh with tall guys.

I do actually see plenty of unique women, but my problem is that I'm pretty fucking boring. I'm like an 8 in looks and am in good shape, but I basically go to work, go home and do nothing, or watch anime with my one friend. I've met 1 girl from Tinder, and had a blast playing a board game with her, but maintaining communication and trying to set up another meeting is difficult. I don't have anything to say or any plans, and clearly can't compete with any friends or suitors she has in her life. Should I just give up? I'd have sex with everyone I match with, but I can't tell who's interested nor do I know how to get that going.

You're overthinking this. Take the initiative and make plans. Develop new hobbies, preferably something a bit more social than watching TV shows. You want to see her again? Engage her interests- get out of your own comfort zone.

 

[rambis]

Sarcastic dog filter-using hikers who love to laugh with tall guys.

I do actually see plenty of unique women, but my problem is that I'm pretty fucking boring. I'm like an 8 in looks and am in good shape, but I basically go to work, go home and do nothing, or watch anime with my one friend. I've met 1 girl from Tinder, and had a blast playing a board game with her, but maintaining communication and trying to set up another meeting is difficult. I don't have anything to say or any plans, and clearly can't compete with any friends or suitors she has in her life. Should I just give up? I'd have sex with everyone I match with, but I can't tell who's interested nor do I know how to get that going.

What are you looking for exactly?

 

[n0razi]

Well some women use "Myspace angles" when taking selfies. Guys should do the same thing and list their height (wearing platform shoes).

 

[Fewr]

Honestly if you're using Tinder to meet women your self-esteem has likely already hit rock bottom.

I really don't see why. Care to explain?

 

[Llyranor]

The fine line between ridiculousness for me though is not that a woman want's a taller man, but the emphasis on the numbers. A woman might be totally attracted to a tall 5ft11 guy in person, but online because he's not that magic 6ft plus he'd be ignored regardless.

I'll agree that having a very specific height cutoff is kind of dumb. 6' is so arbitrary. People want a nice round number. I blame the awful imperial system for this!

 

[Subpar Spatula]

We should try to make 5'5 the new norm.

We're taking height back!

 

[Filth]

We should try to make 5'5 the new norm.

We're taking height back!

I'm 5'5 &#128524; But I compensate with muscles &#128527;

 

[GatorBait]

I took a business trip to St. Louis and swiped like 50 matches in day. It was magical.

 

[MogCakes]

We should try to make 5'5 the new norm.

We're taking height back!

Shortness has its advantages. Not having to deal with a large majority of shallow people in the dating pool is a blessing in disguise.

 

[ClosingADoor]

I'll agree that having a very specific height cutoff is kind of dumb. 6' is so arbitrary. People want a nice round number. I blame the awful imperial system for this!

Move to Europe. It's 1.80 here mostly, so that's a few centimeter difference!

Also my exact height.