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[Sifl]

At this point the best (realistic) outcome is she continues to ignore you, or she treats it as a "let's forget this happened" situation and remain friends. As others have said, just move on.

 

[ZombieSupaStar]

well on the bright side at least you went for it (albeit a bit too much) and you weren't like a brother to her.

 

[Goldenhen]

She gave you plenty of hints that she's not interested in you and yet you still keep harassing her to go on date with you. >_<

 

[CarpeDeezNutz]

And it should be mentioned in every thread like this.


Space Jesus, use thy hippie astronaut powers to set this poor sod on the right path that he not awkwardly call up this woman at 10 o'clock in the goddamned morning to profess his love"

 

[Carcetti]

I kept texting her every day (just about 3-4 messages) and tried to not to be annoying, and that&#8217;s when I noticed she became even less responsive (from to a 1/3 reply rate to a 1/6 reply rate). I got the sense that she&#8217;s losing interest in me while I had become more infatuated than ever with her. That&#8217;s why and when I started to become desperate&#8230;

I dislike hard and fast rules but:

- Max 1 message per day unless you get a reply in which case it's ok to send one more message before another reply etc.

What you described makes you sound clingy and desperate. Not a sexy combo by any means.

 

[yogloo]

Nothing turns a women off more than the scent of a desperate man.

It works in movies!

 

[shuri]

1. You creeped her out a long time ago.
2. She was just being polite by saying yes and then cancelling/avoiding. It's a passive way to avoid confrontations.
3. She is probably scared of you
4. You confessed feelings for a woman without having much interaction with her at all. What the fuck?
5. You probably are the laughing stock at the office and she has probably made aware all the other females about how creepy you are with her
6. Don't be surprised if you get into MASSIVE TROUBLE at work over this for Harassment.
7. Real life is not an anime or a dating sim, stop quantifying your interactions with her.
8. Leave her alone, god damnit.

 

[Maddocks]

you are about 3 texts away from "if you don't reply to this I'm going to kill myself"

you know you are rejected and yet still asked her to reject you because you have a problem moving on. Just move on and don't waste your time on her, even if she does text you back just ignore it.

 

[Tagyhag]

Damn OP, you tried way too hard. I understand that you might not have seen that at the beginning but she did drop hints. (Yeah telling you outright would have been better but maybe she thought you were just trying to be friends at first)

 

[TunaMarshmallow]

1. You creeped her out a long time ago.
2. She was just being polite by saying yes and then cancelling/avoiding.
3. She is probably scared of you
4. You confessed feelings for a woman without having much interaction with her at all. What the fuck?
5. You probably are the laughing stock at the office and she has probably made aware all the other females about how creepy you are with her
6. Don't be surprised if you get into MASSIVE TROUBLE at work over this for Harassement.

That's really helpful. You're really helpful.

 

[RukusProvider]

Latetotheparty
She already left before I got there

Then link the tag back to this thread.


Dude wtf seriously.

 

[AlexMogil]

Burn all your fedoras and duster jackets and enjoy the day.

Move on.

 

[EscoBlades]

 

[dark_prinny]

1. You creeped her out a long time ago.
2. She was just being polite by saying yes and then cancelling/avoiding.
3. She is probably scared of you
4. You confessed feelings for a woman without having much interaction with her at all. What the fuck?
5. You probably are the laughing stock at the office and she has probably made aware all the other females about how creepy you are with her
6. Don't be surprised if you get into MASSIVE TROUBLE at work over this for Harassement.

Listen to this woman, she speaks the truth.

 

[shira]

As usual, the Brad Pitt rule applies:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V0hlpctj0qs

Is OP married? That was really weird.

 

[Scully Scully Scoo]

1. You creeped her out a long time ago.
2. She was just being polite by saying yes and then cancelling/avoiding.
3. She is probably scared of you
4. You confessed feelings for a woman without having much interaction with her at all. What the fuck?
5. You probably are the laughing stock at the office and she has probably made aware all the other females about how creepy you are with her
6. Don't be surprised if you get into MASSIVE TROUBLE at work over this for Harassment.
7. Real life is not an anime or a dating sim, stop quantifying your interactions with her.
8. Leave her alone, god damnit.

^^^ignore his tc. there are many positives to take from this experience, its not all bad. u live and learn

 

[Alcotholic]

She's playing hard to get. Try harder, OP.

Spoiler

lol

 

[cr_blah_blah]

You need to learn about date theater OP.

Persistence tends to be seen as creepiness in my experience. You have to strike a nice balance. I just made up this analogy that seems appropriate:

Love is a highway.
I WANNA RIDE IT ALL NIGHT LONG.
IF YOU'RE GOING MY WAY
I WANNA DRIVE IT ALL NIGHT LONG

I agree.

 

[EVOL 100%]

Dear god why

OP you fucked up the moment that you were the only one asking her out, realized it but couldn't take the hint

 

[kingkitty]

(´&#12539;&#969;&#12539;`)

Send a few more texts.

 

[udiie]

op you came off too desperate. you making the first move is good but you gotta feel things out to see how they go. also when you first send her a text, if she doesnt reply, dont send her another one.

2. She was just being polite by saying yes and then cancelling/avoiding.

fuck this though lol.

 

[pelicansurf]

Reading the op involved making many painful expressions. OP, this shit is bad for your health.

 

[late to the party]

Lose a ho, gain a ho.

but seriously, looks like you didn't take her hints and pursued it too hard. That is something you need to be more aware of

Kind of... I took the hints and that's why I always tried something new to get her attention when I found the old way didn't work. I just persisted... but I do see a limited so I have decided to let go and stopping bother her any more.

I just can't find the balance, e.g. between persistence and bothersome.

 

[Biff]

It sounds like you knew she wasn't interested and pressed anyway. Chalk it up to a loss and move on. Should have saved her the frustration of spelling it out for you.

I don't think it's a matter of simply moving on.

OP needs serious help. I mean, I think we've all experienced the infatuation stage and have done things that we now shake our heads at... But man, 1 out of 6 reply rate, and he kept texting her 3-4 times every day? What the fuck.

He needs a complete reconstruction from the ground up. Even with a 100% improvement before the next girl, that still amounts to daily texting, complete with passive aggressive whining when he isn't getting responses immediately.

 

[NomarTyme]

Move on if you can. There are plenty of fishes in the sea.

 

[Cloud Strife]

Kind of... I took the hints and that's why I always tried something new to get her attention when I found the old way didn't work. I just persisted... but I do see a limited so I have decided to let go and stopping bother her any more.

I just can't find the balance, e.g. between persistence and bothersome.

If she was never taking any initiative (and I don't mean going along with your plan suggestions that you initially made), then that's your cue to let it go.

 

[crazy monkey]

Dude stop.

 

[Winterfang]

It's time to move on.

Ok I'm in need lf a lesson.

What does L means?
What does Goat means?
What does thirst means?
What does Ether means?

 

[stn]

For the future...

-Text less.
-Make your intentions clear at the very beginning. Seems like you wanted to date her all along and yet she just kind of hung around because she was afraid of confrontation
-Try to avoid sending "emotional" messages
-You conditioned her into having lunch hangouts and whatever, she bailed the moment you wanted a more intimate hangout

Basically, if you like a girl then just ask her out at the very beginning. Don't shield it with mass lunch invites in the hope that something organic will blossom from it.

 

[Kano on the Phone]

From February, she started to become evasive about my lunch proposals but I still managed to get her out with me. And we still had pleasant conversations when we met. I kept texting her every day (just about 3-4 messages) and tried to not to be annoying, and that’s when I noticed she became even less responsive (from to a 1/3 reply rate to a 1/6 reply rate). I got the sense that she’s losing interest in me while I had become more infatuated than ever with her. That’s why and when I started to become desperate…

Damn dude. "Managed to get her out..." With you? Didn't that point where you realized you were having to manipulate someone into spending time with you make you realize they weren't interested? Why would you send more than one or two messages to someone who wasn't replying? Did you think she forgot and so six would remind her that she didn't text you back?

You made a work friend and then pushed her away by being fucking weird when she was clearly not interested. The fact you fell in love with this person tells me that you don't have much experience and can use this as a really embarrassing learning experience.

This paragraph is just the worst part of a long rant made by someone who sounds awkward to the point of being creepy. Seriously, never act like this toward another person you want to be interested in you in any capacity.

 

[Derwind]

Kind of... I took the hints and that's why I always tried something new to get her attention when I found the old way didn't work. I just persisted... but I do see a limited so I have decided to let go and stopping bother her any more.

I just can't find the balance, e.g. between persistence and bothersome.

Uhhhh.... don't do that. Ever again. If you have to work to get her attention, it was over before it began.

Sorry buddy.

 

[XenodudeX]

 

[EVOL 100%]

If she was never taking any initiative (and I don't mean going along with your plan suggestions that you initially made), then that's your cue to let it go.

Pretty much dude. If she had interest she would have showed it early on. You can't make someone interested by 'changing your approach'

 

[Buzzati]

1. You creeped her out a long time ago.
2. She was just being polite by saying yes and then cancelling/avoiding. It's a passive way to avoid confrontations.
3. She is probably scared of you
4. You confessed feelings for a woman without having much interaction with her at all. What the fuck?
5. You probably are the laughing stock at the office and she has probably made aware all the other females about how creepy you are with her
6. Don't be surprised if you get into MASSIVE TROUBLE at work over this for Harassment.
7. Real life is not an anime or a dating sim, stop quantifying your interactions with her.
8. Leave her alone, god damnit.

Oh fucking please

 

[Sobriquet]

You need to learn about date theater OP.

Persistence tends to be seen as creepiness in my experience. You have to strike a nice balance. I just made up this analogy that seems appropriate:

Love is a highway.
I WANNA RIDE IT ALL NIGHT LONG.
IF YOU'RE GOING MY WAY
I WANNA DRIVE IT ALL NIGHT LONG

I agree.

haha

 

[Brazil]

You sound annoying as hell, OP. Contain your thirst and better luck next time.

 

[FourMyle]

Long story short: It’s one-sided romance. I texted her but haven’t got any reply (Seen &#10003;&#10003. I know I am done and just to vent.

Not sure if this is the right place. Anyway It’s my first thread here and, I just want to vent…

I met this girl about six months ago at my workplace (we are not in the same office though), and we started to do lunch together about once a week or two. When I asked her for lunch (I kept asking her once a week), she always replied yes and even if it’s no she would come up a reason. Every time, I brought her to a new restaurant and we did have some very nice conversations (at least to me). At the same time, I started to text (Whatsapp) her more but she’s not that responsive. I thought it’s ok because I could not expect people to reply to my every single message and sometimes I just wanted to share with her and she may not relate. Still, I always tried to bring up something fresh and relevant and encourage her to voice out her thoughts more, although she rarely did.

From February, she started to become evasive about my lunch proposals but I still managed to get her out with me. And we still had pleasant conversations when we met. I kept texting her every day (just about 3-4 messages) and tried to not to be annoying, and that’s when I noticed she became even less responsive (from to a 1/3 reply rate to a 1/6 reply rate). I got the sense that she’s losing interest in me while I had become more infatuated than ever with her. That’s why and when I started to become desperate…

There were many times (during our lunch times) I asked her out for movies/walk in park/dinner and she always said yes. She even proposed some movies and suggested a place for us to go. But when I make a proper invitation the very next day, she just acted evasive. At first, she declined with reasons, and then she just didn’t reply at all.

I kept texting her (with things may interest her and we have in common) but she was just ignoring my messages almost entirely. I also kept asking her for lunch (and trying my best to not be bothersome) but she always rejected me at the last minute, again with reasons (about friends/work/etc.).

I knew this could not be kept long so I stopped contacting her earlier this month. Then, only three days later, I happened to see her at the workplace so I again asked her for lunch for the week before Easter… She said yes but didn’t live up to it. Since I knew she’s busy for that week so I didn’t quite mind and instead asked her out for the Easter (via Whatsapp):

Me: It’s a long holiday; maybe we can find a day free and go out somewhere.
She: where
Me: (A lot of suggestions but I pointed out what I liked the most)
She: which one
Me: (replied in detail)

She didn’t reply since. I texted her that I didn’t like that and asked her to reject me if she wanted and just not to ignore my invitations because I was sick of all the waiting…

So a few hours ago I sent her my last message. Instead of telling her I was hopelessly in love with her, I just told her that “pursuing someone desperately will creep them out… It’s better to make mistakes and then learn from them…” It’s a short message. Not sure if it means anything or not but I guess it’s my last.

OK. Time to let go now. It’s hard though…

Sorry I didn’t realize it would be this long... as I just wanted to vent.

Share if you have any thoughts/experiences.

 

[daycru]

Sounds like you guys were okay friends, then you got pushy when she retreated a little. You are in quicksand at that point. Now you are here. Just important to not obsess over it, and learn something. Delete her number.

 

[late to the party]

Your text confessional is vague and confusing. That said, don't ever text her again unless she texts you.

Yes. Pretty much what I think and intend to

 

[entremet]

Confessions of "love" never ever work. Just never do it. It's not the movies, bro.

If she's not recipocrating, move on.

 

[CarpeDeezNutz]

Ok I'm in need lf a lesson.

What does L means?
What does Goat means?
What does thirst means?
What does Ether means?

Take the loss
Greatest of all time
Want someone really bad
Getting burned

 

[caesar]

Ever heard of playing it cool??? Persistence is off putting and signals thirst.

 

[Raitosaito]

He numerically measured the amount of text he gets... OP don't put any pussy on a pedestal.

 

[Scully Scully Scoo]

Ok I'm in need lf a lesson.

What does L means?
What does Goat means?
What does thirst means?
What does Ether means?

1. loss
2. greatest of all time
3. horny
4. burn

 

[flamingotripod]

^^^ignore his tc. there are many positives to take from this experience, its not all bad. u live and learn

No there is nothing positive to take away from this

 

[theJohann]

7. Real life is not an anime or a dating sim, stop quantifying your interactions with her.

I honestly think this is the main point I want to get across to you, OP. The way you measure the ratio of her texts to yours is just such a troubling, saddening approach to relationships in general.

 

[Tornado Condor]

So a few hours ago I sent her my last message. Instead of telling her I was hopelessly in love with her, I just told her that “pursuing someone desperately will creep them out… It’s better to make mistakes and then learn from them…” It’s a short message. Not sure if it means anything or not but I guess it’s my last.

.

Damn, son. Absolute beta mode

 

[Chinner]

have you considered watching my little pony?

 

[joeygreco1985]

Jesus Christ you must be so awkward in real life.

 

[Brinbe]

Not gonna lie, op. That was a really tough read. Should have took your L a long time ago and moved on. A women who is genuinely interested will make an effort to reply to you. Forcing things never ever works.

You're better off finding someone that isn't a chore to talk to and coordinate plans with.