Ulysses 31
Member
My guess is that he knows about the brand on Galadriel's dead brother.
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Toytown Assassin
Member
He's met her.
This episode was a bore, and didn't make a lot of sense.
They were all in a tiny village but couldn't find each other?
There was a volcano rock hitting the orchard but not anything around it in miles?
The whole Durin stuff is just so weak, episodes on episodes on this feels endless.
I skimmed a lot of it, couldn't take it.
They were all in a tiny village but couldn't find each other?
There was a volcano rock hitting the orchard but not anything around it in miles?
The whole Durin stuff is just so weak, episodes on episodes on this feels endless.
I skimmed a lot of it, couldn't take it.
Toytown Assassin
Member
I've given up on it getting any better. I just power through it so I can enjoy all the content on youtube ripping the shit out if it.
I did have a good laugh this episode though when the hobbit wagons got incinerated. Talk about had it coming.
Nickolaidas
Member
You literally don't have to bother. Nerdorotic, Disparu, ItsaGundam, Mauler and Drinker rip its arsehole apart, I love it, and I have yet to see a single episode, refusing to pay Amazon for raping one of the progenitors of D&D fantasy.
Toytown Assassin
Member
It's more fun for me if I've seen it 1st. Anyway I don't pay for amazon I'm mooching off my daughter with their family sharing thing
Elysion
Banned
Guys, I think I know how they’ll do the Halbrand=Sauron reveal:
Galadriel: “Now that I think about it, your backstory doesn’t really make much sense. How did you end up on that raft? How did you get your hands on that royal amulet? How could a mere human forge weapons on par with the best of Elven craftsmanship? Who are you really, Halbrand?”
Halbrand: *smirks*
The name ‘Halbrand’ then appears over his head, before it gets crossed out and replaced with ‘Sauron’.
Galadriel: Noooooooooo!
Fade to credits. 10/10. Emmy nomination guaranteed.
Galadriel: “Now that I think about it, your backstory doesn’t really make much sense. How did you end up on that raft? How did you get your hands on that royal amulet? How could a mere human forge weapons on par with the best of Elven craftsmanship? Who are you really, Halbrand?”
Halbrand: *smirks*
The name ‘Halbrand’ then appears over his head, before it gets crossed out and replaced with ‘Sauron’.
Galadriel: Noooooooooo!
Fade to credits. 10/10. Emmy nomination guaranteed.
haha, yeah, that Mordor "reveal" was so stupid, and it shows how stupid the show-runners think their audience is.
SirKicksalot
Member
Fake
Member
'Its you. You really are Gandalf the White'.
I think it's a bit more nuanced than that.
It shows how smart they think they are.
They reek of it. From their interviews, their posture, even how they sit while discussing the show. They truly believe themselves to be brilliant storytellers on level with the greats. There is no humility.
And that's the irony of it all. The audience is smarter than them.
It's failing up. They have no record to their name, anything good, nothing. It's amazing how people like that get a chance.
Ulysses 31
Member
What I often hear about shows pointing out obvious things is that those are made for people messing on their phones while "watching".
Ulysses 31
Member
Fbh
Member
Someone's actually carrying someone TOWARDS that cloud in that gif?
Well hey, you are supposed to keep wounded people warm. That's just first aid 101
DeepEnigma
Gold Member
"come towards the light, peter, come come...."Someone's actually carrying someone TOWARDS that cloud in that gif?
pramod
Banned
So i guess the masterplan started with Sauron somehow convincing Gil Galad to get rid of Galadriel.
But how did he know she was going to change her mind and jump into the middle of the ocean?
Dont know.
How was he able to get to where she is, create the whole scenario with the raft/Sea serpent etc before she drowned?
Dont know.
How did he know they were going to survive a huge storm and get blown into the path of a Numeroean ship?
Dont know.
How did he know Galadriel will keep insisting he return with her to ME as he keeps refusing?
Dont know.
How did he know severely beating a bunch of Numeroeans will just get him thrown in jail and not executed?
Dont know.
How did he know Adar would successfully trigger the volcano? How did he know they will all be there at the same time as the explosion?
Dont know.
How did he know Galadriel would survive the explosion? How did he know that Galadriel knows that his wounds would require elven medicine?
Dont know.
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SirKicksalot
Member
Surely the mountain was meant to erupt in the distance and then they fucked it in post.Someone's actually carrying someone TOWARDS that cloud in that gif?
The production was impacted by Covid and Weta Digital was working from home, so odd faults are to be expected.
However, they also took a big break after shooting and completing the first two episodes, with the purpose of reviewing the work so far and adjusting the rest of the season... I haven't watched it but every Friday I laugh at what they came up with.
TheGrat1
Member
It's Superman.
pramod
Banned
What pisses me off about the Halbrand=Sauron thing is that they've perfectly set him up to be the Witch King, he can be a great foil to Galadriel, he gets corrupted and she has to fight him in the Last Battle. Heck he's even going to the Elves right now, so that he can be the first human king to get a ring. But they're going to throw all that great setup away to turn him into Sauron. Sigh.
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PhaseJump
Banned
If you make your show for people wstchinh their phones you've already lost.What I often hear about shows pointing out obvious things is that those are made for people messing on their phones while "watching".
Make a show that'll make people forget they even have one.
They're essentially con artists. They sold a story that they were brilliant creatives not given the chance they deserved during a full decade of aborted projects in Hollywood. In reality, if they're so talented, why is no one picking up their work after so many times at bat? It likely would've stayed that way, and the world would be better off, but apparently JJ Abrams made a phone call on their behalf that landed them RoP.
They also sold a story that they know Tolkien better than anyone, that staying faithful to the source material is incredibly important to them. All the execs believed them. Given the results we've just suffered through, they're obviously full of shit.
Hollywood Reporter said:
Great sympathetic story, but maybe they didn't land a single credit because they're terrible writers.
Hollywood Reporter said:
Con artists.
Hollywood Reporter said:
Phew, what a relief that we didn't get Anthony McCarten, award-winning historian, novelist, and two-time Academy Award nominated screenwriter. Or the Russo Brothers, veteran directors of big budget action-adventure epics. Instead, we got the really persuasive guys who did some uncredited rewrites on an abandoned JJ Abrams Star Trek movie.
Hollywood Reporter said:
PhaseJump
Banned
This show is fan fiction wish fulfillment from amateurs in the industry, given a big break and the go ahead by big money that chases marketing tie ins. Publishers let HBO, Amazon and Netflix shit all over book covers with emblems and publishing deals, they all react to trends and marketing.
Game of Thrones brought quality until they ran out of material to copy, and the showrunners were revealed to be derivative hacks. Witcher got off to a rocky start, but it is propped up by actors that actually care about it and have talent. Wheel of Time is the same as Witcher, only that is largely being carried by Rosamund Pike's performance and it will likely end up quickly axed once it reaches a threshold where adding additionally seasons to production is diminished due to the necessity for new audience growth to go back and binge older content. If it's complicated shit and takes forever to get into, it will get cancelled no matter what. Anything requiring an attention span is lost.
Rings of Power is just something new and grotesque to this paradigm. Massive budget and 5 season order toward the fan fiction. Activist shilling in the marketing from a bad cast of diverse actors, pivoting negative feedback toward narratives of audience racism or victimization. Nobody that cares about or understands the source material in charge. Pandering everything to the mainstream while delivering horrible, hateful, illogical characters that chase fickle, shallow plot macguffins that never matter in the end.
It's like Amazon directly saw GoT explode the book sales of Ice and Fire, or even The Witcher, and figured that Lord of the Rings could reap that trend with little to no effort or care.
It's what Disney did to Star Wars, only difference here being that Amazon never spent their money to outright acquire the entire franchise rights for this shit. I don't know whether that's smart, or stupid.
We live in an era where all the big TV/Movie writers are just derivative hacks with no talent, reaping the thirst for new, fickle and trendy content. Shitheads with no talent, phoning it in. Raised in the post '80s & '90s era where everything in all kinds of media, even cartoons and kids programming turned edgy, bleak, snarky, full of totally shitty attitudes.
Who's going to pick up and adapt other new fantasy series after this one? What's left out there that is still un-fucked? Memory Sorrow and Thorn? We know Sanderson is getting Mistborn kicked around in the Hollywood meat grinder. I've been awake for too long, and I'm mutating into a retard over this.
Game of Thrones brought quality until they ran out of material to copy, and the showrunners were revealed to be derivative hacks. Witcher got off to a rocky start, but it is propped up by actors that actually care about it and have talent. Wheel of Time is the same as Witcher, only that is largely being carried by Rosamund Pike's performance and it will likely end up quickly axed once it reaches a threshold where adding additionally seasons to production is diminished due to the necessity for new audience growth to go back and binge older content. If it's complicated shit and takes forever to get into, it will get cancelled no matter what. Anything requiring an attention span is lost.
Rings of Power is just something new and grotesque to this paradigm. Massive budget and 5 season order toward the fan fiction. Activist shilling in the marketing from a bad cast of diverse actors, pivoting negative feedback toward narratives of audience racism or victimization. Nobody that cares about or understands the source material in charge. Pandering everything to the mainstream while delivering horrible, hateful, illogical characters that chase fickle, shallow plot macguffins that never matter in the end.
It's like Amazon directly saw GoT explode the book sales of Ice and Fire, or even The Witcher, and figured that Lord of the Rings could reap that trend with little to no effort or care.
It's what Disney did to Star Wars, only difference here being that Amazon never spent their money to outright acquire the entire franchise rights for this shit. I don't know whether that's smart, or stupid.
We live in an era where all the big TV/Movie writers are just derivative hacks with no talent, reaping the thirst for new, fickle and trendy content. Shitheads with no talent, phoning it in. Raised in the post '80s & '90s era where everything in all kinds of media, even cartoons and kids programming turned edgy, bleak, snarky, full of totally shitty attitudes.
Who's going to pick up and adapt other new fantasy series after this one? What's left out there that is still un-fucked? Memory Sorrow and Thorn? We know Sanderson is getting Mistborn kicked around in the Hollywood meat grinder. I've been awake for too long, and I'm mutating into a retard over this.
Tams
Member
Fuck me, this just gets worse and worse.
I saw comments that the battle is much better. And yeah, something actually happens for a change, but it was a load of bullshit. This, at times seemingly tiny, then suddenly huge Numenorean army comes charging to save a hovel of about five houses (that is supposed to represent the entire Southlands). There are at times apparently lots of Southlanders, but then it looks like a village's worth most of the time (who wouldn't fit into the five houses). Oh, did I mention the dirty medieval peasant theme? At best that's such a cliché.
The very conveniently placed reservoir with the convenient key. And the orcs being able to easily tunnel, but for some reason needing to make an above ground river most of the way... Further, while phreatomagmatic eruptions are massive, they tend to either just produce a lot of smoke and ash, or massively explode flattening the volcano. Even then, not to the cataclysmic extent this shit showed.
Quite a few of the costumes look really cheap. The CGI isn't that impressive.
Then the Harfoots... ungrateful little shits, that then suddenly start to care in some of the shittest storytelling I have ever seen. What are they? All five-years-old?!
The music is yet again utterly ham-fisted. The dialogue is almost all stilted and mostly cringeworthy. Yet more slow-mo, and scenes that seem like they are never going to end.
Don't get me started on Galadriel's boyfriend (who magically is now the king of the peasant village).
The only good stuff is presumably Gandalf, and any scene with Durin in it (especially with Elrond).
And that's all I could be bothered to remember.
Geez, and they had how much to make this?!
I saw comments that the battle is much better. And yeah, something actually happens for a change, but it was a load of bullshit. This, at times seemingly tiny, then suddenly huge Numenorean army comes charging to save a hovel of about five houses (that is supposed to represent the entire Southlands). There are at times apparently lots of Southlanders, but then it looks like a village's worth most of the time (who wouldn't fit into the five houses). Oh, did I mention the dirty medieval peasant theme? At best that's such a cliché.
The very conveniently placed reservoir with the convenient key. And the orcs being able to easily tunnel, but for some reason needing to make an above ground river most of the way... Further, while phreatomagmatic eruptions are massive, they tend to either just produce a lot of smoke and ash, or massively explode flattening the volcano. Even then, not to the cataclysmic extent this shit showed.
Quite a few of the costumes look really cheap. The CGI isn't that impressive.
Then the Harfoots... ungrateful little shits, that then suddenly start to care in some of the shittest storytelling I have ever seen. What are they? All five-years-old?!
The music is yet again utterly ham-fisted. The dialogue is almost all stilted and mostly cringeworthy. Yet more slow-mo, and scenes that seem like they are never going to end.
Don't get me started on Galadriel's boyfriend (who magically is now the king of the peasant village).
The only good stuff is presumably Gandalf, and any scene with Durin in it (especially with Elrond).
And that's all I could be bothered to remember.
Geez, and they had how much to make this?!
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Alex11
Member
Well, despite this atrociously boring episode, I still have hope for the final episode, that somehow Sauron isn't Halbrand.
But if he is, Jesus, those are lots of maybe's and unknowns in this plan of his. That's some next level planning right there, even the Valar couldn't plan it better.
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Tams
Member
Not much to say about HotD other than overall it's very good.
This shit show on the other hand... I could rant all day. Just because there's 'discussion', doesn't mean it is a good thing.
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Alex11
Member
Yeah, guess so. Maybe we're being mean or too judgemental, but it just keeps coming. And I really want it to be better, and still have hope.
And not just the lines, fuck me, you see the Harfoots being melodramatic about a couple of trees burned, when right next to them are more fucking trees, I mean ... what is that?
Bragr
Banned
I was wondering the same, it was like there was one apple tree in the entire forest, and that exact tree was hit by the volcano rock.
Alex11
Member
As so many others stated already, yeah the Mordor reveal is bad ... I would categorize it as almost surreal. I just starred at the screen, rewind it a couple of times, wondering if I'm an imbecile for not seeing the true meaning behind it.
Why didn't they just use the map, and change the name there? The map is one of the few positives of this show.
newtypepilot
Member
this show is a fine example of how you fail upwards in hollywood. Get amazon to give you unlimited budget so you and your untalented friends can write some amateur level horrible fanfiction that spends more effort ticking the pandering checklist than respecting the source material.
There's another episode?
How did anyone survive this?
Hmm, let me check my notes on deep, meaningful Rings of Power wisdom for an answer:
The sea is always right.
There is a tempest in me.
Stab, twist, gut.
There can be no trust between hammer and rock.
Nothing is evil in the beginning.
An avalanche can start with one stone.
Faith may bind one heart, but it is too fine a thread from which to hang a kingdom.
Cleverness is for men of small ambition.
It's folly to kick against a current.
Loyalty to a friend ought to be expected regardless of his race.
A kingdom should be led, not dragged.
A burden shared may be halved or doubled, depending on the heart that receives it.
Sometimes to find the light, we must first touch the darkness.
Find the light, and the shadow will not find you.
Despise not the labor which humbles the heart.
The iron that must bear the most heavy of burdens must also endure the most rigorous tempering.
It darkens the heart, to call dark deeds good. It gives place for evil to thrive inside us.
What cannot be known hollows the mind. Fill it not with guesswork.
Every war is fought both without and within. Of that every soldier must be mindful.
Lord Panda
The Sea is Always Right
Hmm, let me check my notes on deep, meaningful Rings of Power wisdom for an answer:
The sea is always right.
There is a tempest in me.
Stab, twist, gut.
There can be no trust between hammer and rock.
Nothing is evil in the beginning.
An avalanche can start with one stone.
Faith may bind one heart, but it is too fine a thread from which to hang a kingdom.
Cleverness is for men of small ambition.
It's folly to kick against a current.
Loyalty to a friend ought to be expected regardless of his race.
A kingdom should be led, not dragged.
A burden shared may be halved or doubled, depending on the heart that receives it.
Sometimes to find the light, we must first touch the darkness.
Find the light, and the shadow will not find you.
Despise not the labor which humbles the heart.
The iron that must bear the most heavy of burdens must also endure the most rigorous tempering.
It darkens the heart, to call dark deeds good. It gives place for evil to thrive inside us.
What cannot be known hollows the mind. Fill it not with guesswork.
Every war is fought both without and within. Of that every soldier must be mindful.
Tams
Member
The map does look gorgeous, but they always use it so zoomed in the it's useless except for the hardest of Tolkien fans, and frankly, I doubt many of those are left watching at this point (if they ever did).
GnomeChimpsky
Member
Lord of the rings has always done this. Did you forget the beginning of RotK where it says Smeagol on screen as he fights over the ring with Deagol and then as he picks it up and says "my precious" the text morphs into Gollum?
Edit: lol I was beaten to that joke ten times over
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NecrosaroIII
Ask me about my terrible takes on Star Trek characters
I still am, and am unironically enjoying it.
Tams
Member
I honestly think there is something wrong with you then. Seriously.
NecrosaroIII
Ask me about my terrible takes on Star Trek characters
Honestly the only thing bugging me is the mithril subplot, because I don't think mithril needed an origin story, and because I think you have to be VERY careful when invoking the Silmarils. It's not something you play with lightly.
Otherwise I'm just too delighted by seeing characters like Elendil, Gil-Galad and Pharazon on screen. And I love seeing Lindon and Numenor. Never thought I'd see it.
So I'm just happy to be here. There are things I enjoy about Ralph Bakshi LotR and Rankin Bass Return of the King as well, both adaptations people don't like
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Nickolaidas
Member
"Because we want to show you how Sauron *cleverly* rose to power, but we're complete, utter retards so that's what we are coming up with."
TaylorSwiftFan
Member
The fuck are you talking about? We barely saw anything of Numenor and nothing of Lindon other than the only 2 outdoor sets.
Alex11
Member
Yes, that Mithril subplot is kinda dumb, especially because of the Silmarils. We know what they are, but does the show explain it? They went and dropped all that story in the beginning, when they don't have all the rights as I understand it.
Well yeah, those characters are good, I would put here Durin also. But there is so much a good actor can do with an idiotic script.
Cyberpunkd
Member
This is the audience this TV series is aimed at - not many requirements, not questioning, just a nice flic to watch and forget.
Tams
Member
Even though, along with being badly written, acted (for the most part), editted, and constructed, that it takes a giant shit on the original lore?
And the mithril storyline is probably the only good thing about this entire shitshow, mostly because of Durin and to a lesser extent Elrond.
Geez, you're simple minded. And yes, I think that is an insult you deserve.
NecrosaroIII
Ask me about my terrible takes on Star Trek characters
And I think you're overly critical. In any case, I don't think it's healthy to dwell on things you don't like. It makes you be a negative person in general. Find something you like instead of spending time on, instead of stuff you hate.
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darrylgorn
Member
Can I just express how pathetic the name of the music guy is. His name is Bear for chrissake. Not only is that a poorly written first name but it is clearly shitting all over the lore and is an affront to the magesty of the beornings.