-
Hey, guest user. Hope you're enjoying NeoGAF! Have you considered registering for an account? Come join us and add your take to the daily discourse.
My man, there is nothing to spoil. Everything that could be a spoiler was telegraphed to almost embarassing levels from the very beginning.
PhaseJump
Banned
strange headache
Banned
I just can't with this. How can they f*ck this up so bad?
Episode 6 - Choice quote: "Your kind was a mistake."
The whole battle made no goddamn sense and everything looked to frikkin' cheap and small including the flashy show-off moves. The Orcs are absolute pushovers and didn't even manage to kill the peasants they literally held hostage when the Númenóreans (who still look like a boy band) arrived. Bronwyn is now the military leader somehow and their brilliant plan is to annoy the Orcs with two small flaming carts. Bronwyn gets pierced by a massive arrow, but manages to just walk it off with a couple of brandings.
Isildur eating an apple and giving his horse one tiny bite only to throw the rest into the ocean is an absolute d*ck move.
Galadriel "Your Kind was a Mistake" goes full Hitler mode after she and Halbrand kept each other from killing Adar. The forced romance between Galadriel, who is a married woman, and Halbrand just feels so wrong and forced. Theo unwraps the sword and discovers it's a decoy. Nobody including Arondir thought of maybe unwrapping it just to make sure? Turns out the hilt is some key to make Mount Doom go boom... like wtf?
Also, they f*cking changed Tolkien's map, there is no river going to Mt. Doom:
Episode 7 - Choice quote: "Fired in my own mother's womb."
Still adored the chemistry between Elrond and Durin, it's the closest the show has been to feeling like Tolkien. The rest is completely unrecognizable though.
Screw this whole Mithril subplot. Good job on waking up the Balrog though... Plot armor saves all important characters from the massive volcanic eruption. Theo going full wannabe berserk-mode while Galadriel lectures him about revenge makes no goddamn sense. The boy is what, 16? And didn't Galadriel just threaten to outright genocide the Uruks?
Also, f*ck the Harfoots for being unable to cope with 3 burned trees from the eruption. How far did these rocks fly without them noticing the goddamn volcano going off? They also shun the wizard after clearly having witnessed him trying to repair the damage to the orchard... by this point I just want these cheap Chinese Hobbit knockoffs to starve. The 3 Eminem lookalikes suck too, but I must thank them for torching down these little motherf*ckers.
Besides, what's with all the gore? Am I watching a Tolkien show or GoT? Halbrand the instant king being mortally wounded only to get on a horse for 6 frikkin' days! But then maybe it was his plan all along to get into Celebrimbor's forge, which would be the most convoluted plan ever!
The title change from Southland to MUHHORDORRRrrrrrRRRrr was just...wow... do they think we're that stupid?
Episode 6 - Choice quote: "Your kind was a mistake."
The whole battle made no goddamn sense and everything looked to frikkin' cheap and small including the flashy show-off moves. The Orcs are absolute pushovers and didn't even manage to kill the peasants they literally held hostage when the Númenóreans (who still look like a boy band) arrived. Bronwyn is now the military leader somehow and their brilliant plan is to annoy the Orcs with two small flaming carts. Bronwyn gets pierced by a massive arrow, but manages to just walk it off with a couple of brandings.
Isildur eating an apple and giving his horse one tiny bite only to throw the rest into the ocean is an absolute d*ck move.
Galadriel "Your Kind was a Mistake" goes full Hitler mode after she and Halbrand kept each other from killing Adar. The forced romance between Galadriel, who is a married woman, and Halbrand just feels so wrong and forced. Theo unwraps the sword and discovers it's a decoy. Nobody including Arondir thought of maybe unwrapping it just to make sure? Turns out the hilt is some key to make Mount Doom go boom... like wtf?
Also, they f*cking changed Tolkien's map, there is no river going to Mt. Doom:
Episode 7 - Choice quote: "Fired in my own mother's womb."
Still adored the chemistry between Elrond and Durin, it's the closest the show has been to feeling like Tolkien. The rest is completely unrecognizable though.
Screw this whole Mithril subplot. Good job on waking up the Balrog though... Plot armor saves all important characters from the massive volcanic eruption. Theo going full wannabe berserk-mode while Galadriel lectures him about revenge makes no goddamn sense. The boy is what, 16? And didn't Galadriel just threaten to outright genocide the Uruks?
Also, f*ck the Harfoots for being unable to cope with 3 burned trees from the eruption. How far did these rocks fly without them noticing the goddamn volcano going off? They also shun the wizard after clearly having witnessed him trying to repair the damage to the orchard... by this point I just want these cheap Chinese Hobbit knockoffs to starve. The 3 Eminem lookalikes suck too, but I must thank them for torching down these little motherf*ckers.
Besides, what's with all the gore? Am I watching a Tolkien show or GoT? Halbrand the instant king being mortally wounded only to get on a horse for 6 frikkin' days! But then maybe it was his plan all along to get into Celebrimbor's forge, which would be the most convoluted plan ever!
The title change from Southland to MUHHORDORRRrrrrrRRRrr was just...wow... do they think we're that stupid?
Last edited:
Wildebeest
Member
The slow torture is over. I hope we all survived it without turning into orcs.
My biggest fear is that Amazon hires away Condle and Sapochnik from HotD and HBO somehow gets stuck with the RoP writers.
Actually, I think the HotD writers room might push a whole new wave of writers into the forefront because while most of them have decent resumes that show is just a runaway train. I've little interest in the RoP writers other than Stephany Folsom because she did Paper Girls and that was actually pretty good, what happened to her here?
Bragr
Banned
So Halberd wasn't a king and there had been no king for ages, but then why were the southland people waiting for him and expecting a king to pop up?
And that whole mithrill storyline, with the elves dying and needing it to survive, I take it that is something the writers came up with, and not the books? cause it feels so weird, they need to bathe in it? huh?
And that whole mithrill storyline, with the elves dying and needing it to survive, I take it that is something the writers came up with, and not the books? cause it feels so weird, they need to bathe in it? huh?
If the implication is that a river, flowing to the sea, originates inside Mordor AND CROSSES A MOUNTAIN RANGE, well, that's about what I'd expect from writers that only live on the coast and keep their airplane windows down over the "fly over country". What water was that dam even holding up? Is there a lake up there? It really reads like the river flows FROM THE SEA to the dam, then a trickle flows over into Mordor.Also, they f*cking changed Tolkien's map, there is no river going to Mt. Doom:
Episode 7 - Choice quote: "Fired in my own mother's womb."
Then again, on a flat earth maybe that could happen because the gravitational forces would no longer be directly "down" in all areas ahhhhhhh why do I even try with this show!?!
strange headache
Banned
They turned Sauron into a spurned lover... WTF!
Alex11
Member
So for 6 episodes Galadriel didn't think to check for records about Halbrands lineage or nothing in that thousands of years old elf brain of hers didn't spark a little doubt about him.
And if they chose to do Galadriel warrior-ish, then why not make the confrontation between them at least interesting, let them beat the shit out of each other as opposed to a face to face spouting nonsense inside her mind.
And good for them, they included pointless scenes with Isildur's sister and the king or the queen and Elendil, meanwhile my man Isildur is chillin' in that burned house, I mean, we all know he's gonna live, why the unnecessary tension?
They couldn't shove a 2 minute scene with him, but the they can show a 10 minute farewell for the Harfoots.
I still had some hope for the finale, but yeah, don't know now.
And if they chose to do Galadriel warrior-ish, then why not make the confrontation between them at least interesting, let them beat the shit out of each other as opposed to a face to face spouting nonsense inside her mind.
And good for them, they included pointless scenes with Isildur's sister and the king or the queen and Elendil, meanwhile my man Isildur is chillin' in that burned house, I mean, we all know he's gonna live, why the unnecessary tension?
They couldn't shove a 2 minute scene with him, but the they can show a 10 minute farewell for the Harfoots.
I still had some hope for the finale, but yeah, don't know now.
strange headache
Banned
These f*cking greedy bumholes, they just couldn't leave Gandalf alone, could they?
Alex11
Member
Yeah, I mean meteor man is 99,99% Gandalf right?
strange headache
Banned
"Follow your nose"... pretty much confirms it, sadly.
Alex11
Member
And that line of Galadriel from LOTR said by Halbrand "stronger than the foundations of the earth", was that a bit weird or cheesy, or is it just me?
They turned Sauron into a spurned lover... WTF!
DeafTourette
Perpetually Offended
I liked it. It was a bit of reverse foreshadowing for Galadriel...
And that's where I got my tag from. Loved that those movies!
I never read Tolkien, so I don't care so much about the lore.
Overall the show was written badly and for 8 hours of episodes we really got very little in advancing anything, the last episode packed the most punch. Comparing this to Game of Thrones' first season, which had so many different storylines and character development, this felt like a missed opportunity.
The main issue I see with shows today is that they think of the scene they wanna get to at some point, and everything else is sacrificed to get there. They had a lot of time to show us how Gandalf and Nori interact and become friends, how she teaches him things. Instead we got this Gandalf helps>Nori hurt over and over again, until he saves them from people we knew nothing about. They could have flashed those three women out as well, but no. Durin and Elrond also had a merry-go-round storyline.
Galedrial and Halbrand had no meaningful conversations, nothing really connected them. I still don't understand how the rings will cure the elves.
They can fix this for the next season, as all these very low effort storylines sorta closed, but I don't think they can. It could be that they didn't buy the full rights so maybe they are limited and how they tell the story, and in that case, like S5-8 of GoT, they can't write.
Overall the show was written badly and for 8 hours of episodes we really got very little in advancing anything, the last episode packed the most punch. Comparing this to Game of Thrones' first season, which had so many different storylines and character development, this felt like a missed opportunity.
The main issue I see with shows today is that they think of the scene they wanna get to at some point, and everything else is sacrificed to get there. They had a lot of time to show us how Gandalf and Nori interact and become friends, how she teaches him things. Instead we got this Gandalf helps>Nori hurt over and over again, until he saves them from people we knew nothing about. They could have flashed those three women out as well, but no. Durin and Elrond also had a merry-go-round storyline.
Galedrial and Halbrand had no meaningful conversations, nothing really connected them. I still don't understand how the rings will cure the elves.
They can fix this for the next season, as all these very low effort storylines sorta closed, but I don't think they can. It could be that they didn't buy the full rights so maybe they are limited and how they tell the story, and in that case, like S5-8 of GoT, they can't write.
Alex11
Member
Well, I liked it too in LOTR, it was epic, I didn't like it here when Sauron said it. Means she says it because of Sauron, for me it implies a deep connection she has with him in the trilogy and I loathe this relationship thingy they created for them.
Anyway, it's just my take.
TaylorSwiftFan
Member
These clowns ghosted Peter Jackson but them use a lot of visuals from his movies. They are shameless and are hacks. This a show only the idiocracy can enjoy.
balls of snow
Member
They literally need to just focus on the dwarves, the rings for them and Sauron's comeback tour. But no, we probably gonna have some c plot with Isildur's non-existant sister, Galadriel finding herself again and Nori actually taking a shower and developing ocd.
Last edited:
pauljeremiah
Gold Member
Alex11
Member
So why did Sauron appear in Mordor in his Halbrand form? Did he lose his Dark Lord form when Adar supposedly killed him? But he created a new body, and I get the form he uses is to trick others.
But I always though the Dark Lord was his default appearance when he has an actual physical form. Am I wrong?
But I always though the Dark Lord was his default appearance when he has an actual physical form. Am I wrong?
Sauron took on a fair form in the Second Age, as Annatar, until his physical body was destroyed during the fall of Numenor. After that his spirit lived on and he was able to reconstitute himself, but only as a dark lord.
There is no Halbrand Thirsty for Galadriel Form. All bad fanfiction.
Lord Panda
The Sea is Always Right
The whole Mithril and Elves thing is more fan fiction drivel. And shipping Sauron and Galadriel … fuck off.
AJUMP23
Gold Member
Just Trolls.
AJUMP23
Gold Member
They wouldn’t use Annatar because then they give away the mystery box mentality. As soon as they say the name everyone knows. It is dumb because they think you need mystery to keep people coming back. But I knew what was going to happen in the LOTR movies and the other films where I read the book first. A good story doesn’t need mystery at all times. It can be good characters and writing. They did get the but in for Gandalf about following your nose.
Hardensoul
Member
I must’ve missed why they need to make the ring and how it’s supposed to help save the Elves! Also, why/how Galadriel decided they needed 3 rings.
I’m not rewatching to figure it out!
Alex11
Member
Yeah, I was just saying Halbrand form in the show, I was just trying to make some sense, as much sense that I can, based on this show and the mish-mash they are making with the established canon.
Because we see him at the beginning as a dark lord and based on that I assumed that was the form that he chooses to be in. Then Adar kills him, if that is true, and he takes the human form, bla bla bla deceiver, it just struck me odd to see him in Mordor in his human form still so ... yeah the more I think about it, the less sense I make, guess it's better to just let it go.
I just really wanted to see him as a dark lord, instead of that hermit/sith whatever getup he was in.
Became obvious anyway when he had smithing skills and superhuman fighting prowess against the guards in Numenor. He was always leering side-eyed whenever someone would mention Sauron, too.
Setting aside faithlessness to the lore, it's a bad narrative choice because non-book people don't even have a Halbrand mystery box to work with since he's just some guy with a royal claim to a few straw huts. Book readers are beaten over the head with indications that he's Sauron before the halfway point of the season.
Same for Gandalf. Every episode he does something obviously indicating that he is one of the Istari, with boneheaded ambiguity thrown in that he might be a bad guy but not really. There is no dramatic tension and the plot device is recycled over and over, even for the climax.
Madflavor
Member
I'm not sure how they collect their data, but at first glance that's kinda bad right? I mean it's good to be in the Top 10, but relative to it's budget and the franchise it belongs to, that's not a good look for RoP.
Fake
Member
Yes. GoT is already a old series and I can presume She-Hulk still got the Marvel heroes movies for backup the series. Imagine for example if GoT would still beat HotD?
NecrosaroIII
Ask me about my terrible takes on Star Trek characters
Not a fan of Galadriel knowing Sauron wanted to make the rings and just letting him do it anyway. Not a good look for her.
Theories: halbrand will come back and seduce Celebrimbor into making the rest of the rings. He'll do it without anyone knowing besides Celebrimbor ls team. Eventually Celebrimbor will be like "hahahaha you really are a lord of gifts wink wink"
They're gonna retcon the Blue Wizard story. Stranger is clearly Gandalf. But He'll also be the Blue Wizard. The people they meet will also think Nori is a wizard too, even though she's not. So they'll call her a blue wizard too. Eventually Gandalf will go home and Nori die which is why the ie Wizards fell put of legend
Theories: halbrand will come back and seduce Celebrimbor into making the rest of the rings. He'll do it without anyone knowing besides Celebrimbor ls team. Eventually Celebrimbor will be like "hahahaha you really are a lord of gifts wink wink"
They're gonna retcon the Blue Wizard story. Stranger is clearly Gandalf. But He'll also be the Blue Wizard. The people they meet will also think Nori is a wizard too, even though she's not. So they'll call her a blue wizard too. Eventually Gandalf will go home and Nori die which is why the ie Wizards fell put of legend
Just forget the Lore, the writers certainly have.
At this point I expect Nori to make it to Numenor and centuries later it turns into the shire because she founds a race of Hobbits there.
Isildur is dead, his sis tskes his name and fights Sauron with her Da.
Galadriel and Halbrand DID knock boots, it's just elven gestation is 300 human years so Celebrian is totally Sus, so Elrond marries her just to keep an eye on her.
Turns out Balrogs were in the mountain first and it's the dwarves who are imperialists, so yay for losing...I mean returning, moria to the indigenous peoples?
At this point I expect Nori to make it to Numenor and centuries later it turns into the shire because she founds a race of Hobbits there.
Isildur is dead, his sis tskes his name and fights Sauron with her Da.
Galadriel and Halbrand DID knock boots, it's just elven gestation is 300 human years so Celebrian is totally Sus, so Elrond marries her just to keep an eye on her.
Turns out Balrogs were in the mountain first and it's the dwarves who are imperialists, so yay for losing...I mean returning, moria to the indigenous peoples?
Represent.
Represent(ative) of bad opinions
Never watched or read a single fucking second of LOTR before this show. So I had no idea about any of the references and or lore. Shit was hard as hell to follow along.
The show needed more set pieces and action. All that beauty and it was just so much talking.
Enjoyed my time with it though. Will watch season 2 as Im assuming it will be more action heavy
The show needed more set pieces and action. All that beauty and it was just so much talking.
Enjoyed my time with it though. Will watch season 2 as Im assuming it will be more action heavy
Lord Panda
The Sea is Always Right
The thing is, the show runners and writers probably think they're all so goddamn clever and that they're improving on prude stuffy archaic JRR Tolkien! I can almost picture them congratulating each other and foaming at the mouth with each 'ship', 'twist' and 'mystery box' they manage to shove into the show.
"The sea is always right!"
I'm never going to get over that line. JFC.
NecrosaroIII
Ask me about my terrible takes on Star Trek characters
"I've been awake since the breaking of the first silence" is an amazing line. I loved it
Lord Panda
The Sea is Always Right
Last edited:
Cyberpunkd
Member
Yes, I’m going to go with this as well. Let’s be honest - the stuff is pretty archaic, the number of people, lands, names mind boggling. It should have been a labour of love since if you try to make it a multimillion dollar franchise it loses its magic, as you see here. The LotR is just a skin for an average fantasy TV series.
The last scene was 100% inspired by some Star Wars / Sith Lord crap. Tells you all you need about the education of the show runners.
It's more gory than GoT in some ways. Those fountains of blood coming out of people after being stabbed or shot are straight out of an extreme horror movie, except with a much higher budget. Then next scene the Harfoots are prancing and singing as if from a children's story. Then cut back to close-up shots of freshly cut double amputees and burn victims with melted faces.
93xfan
Banned
He already showed he wasn’t in any danger from her. I think he somehow orchestrated their “chance” meeting. Part of his endgame is getting others to wear these rings that will eventually allow him control over them.
Alex11
Member
How in God's name did he orchestrate that? I mean they met in the middle of the damned sea, if you're telling me he knew she would be on the boat to Valinor, let alone jump and try to swim all the way to Middle-Earth that's beyond believable.
Last edited:
Cyberpunkd
Member
What? The elven rings were on purpose made without the help of Sauron, that is why they could be used when the One Ring was not in his possession. Also it clearly says that the moment Sauron put on the one ring the elves realised the trick and stopped using the three immediately.
DeafTourette
Perpetually Offended
93xfan
Banned
How do the lost seeing stones work? How does gandalf’s magic work? I’m more inclined to believe there’s some fantasy based explanation than just some chance meeting.
Haven’t read the books, but don’t know all the magical powers Sauron and his allies have.
Last edited: