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JustHadToJoin
Member
(05-23-2013, 06:49 PM)
Been thinking about sex all day and I got to thinking.. I wonder how other people initiate/end sex? You can only ever see what you do right? How do you change the mood from hanging out to horny? How do you get her to the point where she opens up and lets you dive in? At what point does he get turned on by you enough and decide to lay you down? And at the end how do y'all keep your stuff clean?

I know it shouldn't be the identical all the time but everyone has patterns that work. Here's my routine

Ignoring whats happened in the past couple minutes or hours or whatever, whenever I want to change the mood I begin to take long pauses in between her comments and questions. In between comments so she wonders what I'm thinking and in between questions so she starts to make more eye contact while waiting for a response.

I'll be sure to strengthen bass in my voice a bit more than usual, and I'll slow down my responses a bit..it feels like the rumble of bass echoes into her.

I'll start to speak more forcefully, personally, and interact more directly. For example, should she ask, "you know what I wanted earlier today?" my response isn't, "what?" My response is (remembering to pause for 1/2 - 1.5 seconds) "tell me what you wanted" with direct eye contact and stroking the bass.

Once I notice that she is having trouble continuing normal conversations (not stuttering, but its clear that I'm inside her mind is she is thinking about it-this is plain and obvious) I'll figure out some compliment to bring her my way. "Is that the perfume you bought last week? Come here....gud smel... wow...such scent. "

/touching /kissing /eye contact /seduction

Put on music and I always dive in first. only because women take so much more more to get ready. Theres no routine during however.

I'm really curious about the end. I always have some sort of improvised cumrag around for when I'm ready. I haven't been lucky enough to be with many women who want it on their body, but I've also been lucky enough to be in longer relationships so I always came inside. but it has to come back out and I hate it on my bed. So I just put her on a towel I had nearby or t shirt or blanket or whatever and let it drip onto that. What do other people do? I feel like its weird to do what I do here. You all just let it flow out and then change your sheets? still stains the mattress that way..

this all goes out the window after 7 shots sadly

How do you put in work?
andymcc
Member
(05-23-2013, 06:50 PM)
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stealth brag: the thread.

you're not going to get many responses.
Proteus
BOSS
(05-23-2013, 06:50 PM)
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Routine?

When it becomes routine, you're doing it wrong.
ZombieFred
Junior Member
(05-23-2013, 06:50 PM)
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I like to go by the mood than being conventional.
John Dunbar
correct about everything
(05-23-2013, 06:50 PM)
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i open a new incognito window and see where the evening takes me.
stufte
Banned
(05-23-2013, 06:51 PM)
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Waaay overthinking it...
pigeon
fuck yo restraining order
(05-23-2013, 06:51 PM)
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Who's on First, usually.
Pastry
Member
(05-23-2013, 06:51 PM)
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I don't think I'v ever actually put on music to have sex. If it's already on then cool but I never make the decision to put it on.
Harry Potter
Banned
(05-23-2013, 06:51 PM)
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Originally Posted by andymcc

stealth brag: the thread.

you're not going to get many responses.

I know right, because it's crazy that someone on GAF could actually be having sex. The outrage!!!
Magilla
Member
(05-23-2013, 06:51 PM)
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Mine involves a counter-clockwise swirl.
maomaoIYP
Member
(05-23-2013, 06:51 PM)
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I alternate between the left hand and the right hand.
Kwixotik
Member
(05-23-2013, 06:51 PM)
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I don't even know how to begin to respond to this thread
Darklord
Banned
(05-23-2013, 06:51 PM)
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I sit at the computer and slowly jack off until I find something sick and disgusting, blow my load, then close 46 tabs.
zoukka
Member
(05-23-2013, 06:51 PM)
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You are overthinking it. Especially that rag part...
Ashhong
Member
(05-23-2013, 06:52 PM)
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Originally Posted by JustHadToJoin

I'll start to speak more forcefully, personally, and interact more directly. For example, should she ask, "you know what I wanted earlier today?" my response isn't, "what?" My response is (remembering to pause for 1/2 - 1.5 seconds) "tell me what you wanted" with direct eye contact and stroking the bass.



I just start making out with her in bed and then eventually being more physical and I move downtown, then we switch and then the sex happens.
ohhthegore
extremely sweet beard

seriously, what a hottie
(05-23-2013, 06:52 PM)
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Blowjob then rim job then doggystyle then facial
Patrick Bateman
Member
(05-23-2013, 06:52 PM)
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This routine?
dalin80
Banned
(05-23-2013, 06:52 PM)
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up, down.. repeat.
bud
straight
(05-23-2013, 06:53 PM)
bud's Avatar

Originally Posted by JustHadToJoin

Ignoring whats happened in the past couple minutes or hours or whatever, whenever I want to change the mood I begin to take long pauses in between her comments and questions. In between comments so she wonders what I'm thinking and in between questions so she starts to make more eye contact while waiting for a response.

I'll be sure to strengthen bass in my voice a bit more than usual, and I'll slow down my responses a bit..it feels like the rumble of bass echoes into her.

I'll start to speak more forcefully, personally, and interact more directly. For example, should she ask, "you know what I wanted earlier today?" my response isn't, "what?" My response is (remembering to pause for 1/2 - 1.5 seconds) "tell me what you wanted" with direct eye contact and stroking the bass.



andymcc
Member
(05-23-2013, 06:53 PM)
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Originally Posted by Harry Potter

I know right, because it's crazy that someone on GAF could actually be having sex. The outrage!!!

i think it's a pretty weird question too tbqh
Kentpaul
When keepin it real goes wrong. Very, very wrong.
(05-23-2013, 06:53 PM)
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Foreplay then fucking.
MThanded
I Was There! Official L Receiver 2/12/2016
(05-23-2013, 06:53 PM)
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routine?
ZachDeKoromaru
Member
(05-23-2013, 06:53 PM)
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Originally Posted by Darklord

I sit at the computer and slowly jack off until I find something sick and disgusting, blow my load, then close 46 tabs.

You forgot the part where you only watched three of those.
Fusion Pizza
Member
(05-23-2013, 06:53 PM)
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Uhh, its usually bedroom eyes then to the bedroom...
‹bermatik
Member
(05-23-2013, 06:54 PM)
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I have sex.
Skeyser
Member
(05-23-2013, 06:54 PM)
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i just whip out my penis

but seriously, a routine sounds boring
Log4Girlz
(05-23-2013, 06:54 PM)
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First I drive to the nearest fisting establishment
triplestation
Banned
(05-23-2013, 06:54 PM)
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I brake and then stop the car and then the ho gets in and I have to find a secluded area and then we have some sex and then I kill her to get my money back I don't really need it that much so sometimes I let her go
Incitemaybe
Member
(05-23-2013, 06:54 PM)
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Hilarious OP that became slightly forced by the end. Still, the "low rumbled bass that gets into her mind" made me chuckle.
RK9039
Member
(05-23-2013, 06:54 PM)
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I call it the helicopter.
Ashhong
Member
(05-23-2013, 06:54 PM)
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I'm still laughing at the "tell me what you wanted" part lol.
FairyD
(05-23-2013, 06:55 PM)
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I could only hope for the day that I have so much sex that it becomes routine.
Marjorine
Member
(05-23-2013, 06:55 PM)
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I have been having sex with the same girl for a very long time. It usually starts with one of us saying "You want to do it?" and ends 20 minutes later on some piece of furniture. That is about all the thinking required. It's pleasant.
Draper
Member
(05-23-2013, 06:55 PM)
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What in the fuck...

At what point to you chop her up into pieces?
Grassclipper
Member
(05-23-2013, 06:57 PM)
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"Stroking the bass" is one of the best things I read in a long time.
Raika
Member
(05-23-2013, 06:57 PM)
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I get boners at everything nowadays since I don't fap but don't get laid either. Lucky bastards being able to even talk about routines and shit.
The Anti-Monitor
Banned
(05-23-2013, 06:57 PM)
Jesus Christ, you really do need a manual for everything.

Hey GAF how do i shot web

Just do whatever you want in the moment for fuck's sake.
Proteus
BOSS
(05-23-2013, 06:58 PM)
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Originally Posted by JustHadToJoin


I'll start to speak more forcefully, personally, and interact more directly. For example, should she ask, "you know what I wanted earlier today?" my response isn't, "what?" My response is (remembering to pause for 1/2 - 1.5 seconds) "tell me what you wanted" with direct eye contact and stroking the bass.

TAKE THE DRESS OFF.

PUT THE DRESS BACK ON.

READ THE BOOK.

DON'T READ THE BOOK.

MAKE ME NOODLES!

I find direct commands turn women on too.
ngower
Member
(05-23-2013, 06:58 PM)
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It all begins with some hot self-deprecation. Then I typically submit myself to their will with a quick and timid 'okay.' I avert eye contact throughout, and pretend not to hear them when they ask questions. If all goes well, I can hope our love-making ends in me weeping myself to sleep beneath the sheets.
GhostWriter24
Member
(05-23-2013, 06:58 PM)
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Creepy thread or creepiest thread?
Giggzy
Member
(05-23-2013, 06:58 PM)
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Originally Posted by Marjorine

I have been having sex with the same girl for a very long time. It usually starts with one of us saying "You want to do it?" and ends 20 minutes later on some piece of furniture. That is about all the thinking required. It's pleasant.

This.
JustHadToJoin
Member
(05-23-2013, 06:58 PM)
Maybe I should have said seduction routine. Maybe routine is the wrong word to use but you don't notice yourself doing certain things to get your partner in the mood? Certain things just always work

Originally Posted by zoukka

You are overthinking it. Especially that rag part...

Really, then what do you do? Changing the sheets after every time...is that really how people operate?
Skeyser
Member
(05-23-2013, 06:58 PM)
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Originally Posted by NeoCTN

What in the fuck...

At what point to you chop her up into pieces?

For some reason, the first thing I thought when reading the OP was American psycho
Monocle
Member
(05-23-2013, 06:59 PM)
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You put it in then you take it out.

Edit: "Improvised cumrag." Now there's an evocative phrase.

Originally Posted by Log4Girlz

First I drive to the nearest fisting establishment

I used to be into fisting but the rods were too expensive and I could spend the whole day waiting for a bite.
Last edited by Monocle; 05-23-2013 at 07:03 PM.
steveovig
Member
(05-23-2013, 07:00 PM)
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I just usually say "do you want to have sex sometime in the next few hours." I'm married, it's not some puzzle that needs to be solved.
Grym
Member
(05-23-2013, 07:00 PM)
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Start: "Honey, wanna do it?"

End: each of us go to bathroom, clean up the mess, and get dressed
freshair
Member
(05-23-2013, 07:00 PM)
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*checks watch*

Her: "We have about an hour to kill"

Me: "Yes we do"

Her: "Why are your pants still on?"


Usually as easy as that. But we broke up 2 weeks ago so... that's that. lol
stuminus3
Never buying another games console. Ever.
(05-23-2013, 07:01 PM)
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My wife would laugh me out of the house if I did anything mentioned in the OP.
Giggzy
Member
(05-23-2013, 07:01 PM)
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I'll finish on her ass, chest, back, or any other body location that I'm nearest to first(besides her face, she has to be in her very freaky mood for that). Then I look around for the first piece of cloth or towel I lay my eyes on and clean her up with that. Then we usually go shower after some cuddling.
JustHadToJoin
Member
(05-23-2013, 07:02 PM)

Originally Posted by stuminus3

My wife would laugh me out of the house if I did anything mentioned in the OP.

Me and your wife are incompatible, consider yourself lucky

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